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“Were you expecting me to jump in?” he asked, a look of genuine surprise on his face. He went on to describe the situation as he saw it. “In this room,” he said, turning to M. and Mme. Bernard, “Erin is the chairman of the meeting.” He continued: As she is the senior person in the room, I wait for her to call on me. And, while I am waiting, I should show I am a good listener by keeping both my voice and my body quiet. In China, we often feel Westerners speak up so much in meetings that they do this to show off, or they are poor listeners. Also, I have noticed that Chinese people leave a few
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This perspective from Bo is very helpful to hear out loud as I’ve experienced this in several meetings over the past decade.
Americans and especially workers at start up companies often talk over each other with frenetic energy.
Understanding each persons role and when it makes sense to chime in is a proper lesson in restraint and staying focused.
I would have liked to make one of my points if an appropriate length of pause had arisen. But Erin was always talking, so I just kept waiting patiently. My mother left it deeply engrained in me: You have two eyes, two ears, but only one mouth. You should use them accordingly.
Think before you speak. Make space for others. As light travel faster than sound, be slow to speak in quick to listen. Great perspective here
And this new understanding led to the most important question of all: Once I am aware of the cultural context that shapes a situation, what steps can I take to be more effective in dealing with it?
This quote had me thinking a lot today: the more that I dive into cultural awareness, it’s more important than ever to take these into a practice and not ignoring the things that feel very difficult to change at the moment.
In this book, I provide a systematic, step-by-step approach to understanding the most common business communication challenges that arise from cultural differences, and offer steps for dealing with them more effectively.
This pattern is puzzling because Americans often do tend to be more explicit and direct than the French (or, more precisely, more “low-context,” a term we’ll explore further in a later chapter). The one big exception arises when managers are providing feedback to their subordinates. In a French setting, positive feedback is often given implicitly, while negative feedback is given more directly. In the United States, it’s just the opposite. American managers usually give positive feedback directly while trying to couch negative messages in positive,
This quote was very enlightening: so often as a manager for the past ten years I’ve been trained to take negative feedback and mask it around 2 extra points of positive feedback since Americans can really struggle with directness, especially West Coast colleagues who are ultra delicate. The story of the French person also reminds me so much of us Americans who try to keep everything cheery and can tend to miss out on the importance of being very clear and intentional and communicating areas for improvement.
encouraging language. Thus, when Webber reviewed Dulac’s work using the popular American method of three positives for every negative, Dulac left the meeting with his praise ringing delightfully in her ears, while the negative feedback sounded very minor indeed.
I give a performance review, I always start by going through three or four things I feel the person is doing well.
The sad truth is that the vast majority of managers who conduct business internationally have little understanding about how culture is impacting their work.
This is painfully true and I am just as guilty of this
So whether we are aware of it or not, subtle differences in communication patterns and the complex variations in what is considered good business or common sense from one country to another have a tremendous impact on how we understand one another, and ultimately on how we get the job done.
Many well-intentioned people don’t educate themselves about cultural differences because they believe that if they focus on individual differences, that will be enough.
Cultural patterns of behavior and belief frequently impact our perceptions (what we see), cognitions (what we think), and actions (what we do). The goal of this book is to help you improve your ability to decode these three facets of culture and to enhance your effectiveness in dealing with them.
This rich trove of information and experience informs the eight-scale model that is at the heart of this book. Each of the eight scales represents one key area that managers must be aware of, showing how cultures vary along a spectrum from one extreme to its opposite. The eight scales are: • Communicating: low-context vs. high-context • Evaluating: direct negative feedback vs. indirect negative feedback • Persuading: principles-first vs. applications-first • Leading: egalitarian vs. hierarchical • Deciding: consensual vs. top-down • Trusting:
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There is a range of acceptable ways to give negative feedback in the Netherlands, and a Dutch businessperson can comfortably make a choice that falls anywhere within that range.
PAAAAUUL 😆😆🇳🇱
The point here is that, when examining how people from different cultures relate to one another, what matters is not the absolute position of either culture on the scale but rather the relative position of the two cultures. It is this relative positioning that determines how people view one another.
When you hear the people quoted in this book complain, criticize, or gasp at your culture from their perspective, try not to take it as a personal affront. Instead, think of it as an opportunity to learn more not just about the unfamiliar cultures of this world but also about your own. Try seeing, feeling, and tasting the water you swim in the way a land animal might perceive it. You may find the experience fascinating—and mind-expanding.
I thought the author did a great job addressing that cultural norms are not necessarily the individuals characteristics but they do define what is and is not acceptable on a regional level. So understanding what is expected of a European business person versus someone in Japan is incredibly helpful for getting practical tips and strategies on the diffs
When interacting with someone from another culture, try to watch more, listen more, and speak less. Listen before you speak and learn before you act.
Yes yes yes
My quest for the Swagat restaurant illustrates that being a good listener is just as important for effective communication as being a good speaker. And both of these essential skills are equally variable from one culture to another.
The story did a great job illustrating the repetitive frustration the low context individual felt while trying to follow the instructions of a high context concierge. Until they were explicit about what they needed, the people around them had no idea how to help. Thought it was a good kick off for the chapter.
In low-context cultures, effective communication must be simple, clear, and explicit in order to effectively pass the message, and most communicators will obey this requirement, usually without being fully conscious of it. The United States is the lowest-context culture in the world, followed by Canada and Australia, the Netherlands and Germany, and the United Kingdom.
I laughed when I read this because immediately I felt minorly offended and very quickly realized this is spot on. Truth hurts folks 😆
When I was sixteen, I took an elective class at Minneapolis South High School on giving effective presentations. This is where I learned the traditional American rule for successfully transferring a powerful message to an audience: “Tell them what you are going to tell them, then tell them, then tell them what you’ve told them.” This is the philosophy of low-context communication in a nutshell.
I have learned over the years to repeat and recap everything so that things are crystal clear from *my* POV. I have definitely run into the situation where people I’m working with are getting perturbed because I keep repeating and keep trying to clarify the main points while talking. Obviously I’ve been oblivious to this dynamic 😅
High-context cultures tend to have a long shared history. Usually they are relationship-oriented societies where networks of connections are passed on from generation to generation, generating more shared context among community members.
One interesting quirk is that in high-context cultures, the more educated and sophisticated you are, the greater your ability to both speak and listen with an understanding of implicit, layered messages. By contrast, in low-context cultures, the most educated and sophisticated business people are those who communicate in a clear, explicit way.
This makes complete sense to me now, as my favorite authors and presenters are able to explain both high context and inferred meaning in their words. Why in American business everything is so explicit and laid out?
education tends to move individuals toward a more extreme version of the dominant cultural tendency.
As a result, the British often say that Americans “don’t understand irony.” However, a more precise explanation is that Americans are simply more low-context than the British. So when Americans make a joke, especially in a professional setting, they are likely to indicate clearly through explicit verbal or physical cues, “This is a joke,” something totally unnecessary when one British person is speaking to another. In their higher-context culture, if you have to tell us it was a joke, then it wasn’t worth the breath you used to tell it.
Having several British bosses in the past, I have run into this many many many many times. I just always assume the British person I’m interacting with is low-key making fun of me in some dry humor sense of way - which let’s be real that is probably the case
A question like “Can you complete this project by next week?” may be greeted by a sharp sucking-in of breath or a noncommittal answer: “It will be very difficult, but I’ll do my best,” “We’ll think about it,” or “It will be hard for these reasons, but let me consider it.”
One of the biggest mistakes lower-context managers make is assuming that the other individual is purposely omitting information or unable to communicate explicitly.
If you are the one sending the message, you may find there is less need to repeat yourself endlessly when speaking with high-context colleagues who listen between the lines. Before repeating yourself, stop talking. Wait to learn whether saying it once is enough. You can always come back to the topic later if you’re not sure whether the message got through.
Self-deprecation allows you to accept the blame for being unable to get the message and then ask for assistance.
Be as transparent, clear, and specific as possible. Explain exactly why you are calling. Assert your opinions transparently. Show all of your cards up front. At the end of the phone call, recap all the key points again, or send an e-mail repeating these points straight afterwards. If you are ever not 100 percent sure what you have been asked to do, don’t read between the lines but state clearly that you don’t understand and ask for clarification. And sometimes it would be better to not be quite so polite, as it gives the impression of vagueness or uncertainty.
On a multicultural team, most misunderstanding takes place between people who come from two high-context cultures with entirely different roots, such as the Brazilians communicating with the Chinese.
There is just one easy strategy to remember: Multicultural teams need low-context processes
“Don’t worry Madam. I will organize everything. We have a driver who will take you right to the entrance and pick you up in the same spot. In the meantime I will provide you with a map with the address of the hotel clearly marked and every landmark between here and the ruins. And please take this card with my phone number on it. If you get lost and can’t find the driver I will come and find you myself.” And thus began a marvelous afternoon in New Delhi.
I thought to myself, “This Dutch culture is . . . well . . . different from my own.”
