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to every woman who ever broke a glass ceiling. The shards have painted beautiful battle scars.
To the girls who always wanted to befriend the monster under their bed. Turns out you can fall in love with it too.
while severely allergic to humans, I had a feeling I was even more averse to prison food.
If God existed, which I seriously doubted as a secular modernist, he must’ve spent extra time on the smallest detail in creating her, because every inch of her was pure perfection.
She was, sadly, a remarkable beauty. And that remarkable beauty was staring back at me, looking like she wanted to do very ugly things to me indeed.
Poor fella still hadn’t realized there was no room in her life for a man who wasn’t me.
If I couldn’t have her, no one else could. And I wanted her. Oh yes. Her body anyway. Not that I ever gave her the slightest indication I was attracted to her.
I yanked out my pocket book of Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland and scowled at one of my favorite lines to soothe my anger. “I am not crazy; my reality is just different from yours.”
“What do you want, then?” I actually stomped, losing my patience. “You.” “I beg your pardon?” I misheard him. I must’ve. “If I’m going to break the law and likely a few fucking families standing in line for this bullshit experimental trial, I want your life in exchange for saving your mother’s. It’s symbolic, symmetrical, and one of the very few things money can’t buy me.”
“You, as in you become my wife. You wear my ring. You live under my roof. You take my name. You suck my cock.” He paused, examining his fingers in sheer boredom. “You bear my children. I’m thinking four, minimum. We’re bound to make mistakes on the first few before we create someone worthy to inherit the company. Oh.” He snapped his fingers. “Maintaining my friendships. Socializing is my least favorite pastime. Rhyland’s and Row’s wives seem to like you. Keep up our appearances.”
“Respectfully,” I cleared my throat, “you’re a psychopath.” “I prefer inventive.”
“Sweetheart, the only reason your cunt is not the shape of my dick is because up until now, you were too sufficient for your own good as a PA.”
“Stop right there.” He raised his palm. “Nobody gets to call my future wife a slut other than me.”
“One, this is exclusive. You dump your little boyfriend as soon as you walk out of here. Two, you act like you don’t detest me in public. Three, do not hire anyone to assassinate me. If you want to kill me, do it yourself.”
“Vai a farti fottere!” Enzo stomped his way out in a cloud of juvenile fury. He was surprisingly golden retriever-ish for a mobster. Luca reminded me of a stray. Achilles of a rabies-infected coyote.
“Did you spit in it?” “No.” I waited for him to take a sip before adding, “So if it tastes different, that’s why.”
“Go on then.” A daring glint sparkled behind his pale eyes. I stared at him, aghast. “Go on, what?” “Spit in my coffee. You know I’m very particular about my brew.” “I was kidding. It was a joke.” “Well, I’m not. It tastes off. Spit in it.” “You’re depraved.” “You’re delectable.” “What?” “Thought we were listing each other’s obvious traits?” He cocked a brow.
“Besides, if you do run, I will find you. And when I find you…” He trailed off, giving me one of his infamously callous scowls. “Well, it’d be a crying shame. A woman so young. So pretty.” “I’d call the police,” I threatened. “Please do,” he encouraged. “You are complicit in every single thing I’ve done to secure your mother’s spot at the experimental treatment. Would you like to know how many laws we’ve broken together, fiancée?”
“Have you fucked him yet?” Dylan wiggled her brows. “Does he come lava? Poison? Tar? Asking for a friend.”
“Good, you’re watching the game. Who is winning?” “Your ego.” “I’m not surprised. It’s gigantic. Size matters in football. Hurry up.” “What’s the magic word?” I didn’t have an appetite anyway. Besides, I was eager for Cal and Dylan to go back to their partners to try to defuse the situation. “Immediately?” he tried. I rolled my eyes. “No.” A half-human, half-feral grumble came from the other end of the line. “So?” I coaxed sweetly. “Magic word?” “Abracadabra.” “Try again.” “Alakazam?” “No.” “Hocus-pocus? Open sesame? Daimon? Voilà? Sim sala bim? Fidelio? It largely depends on the period and
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“You’re making a grave mistake, Apricity.” “Apricity?” I whipped my head his way. “The warmth of the sun in winter.” He smirked fiendishly. “It was what popped into my head when I saw you for the first time. There’d been a snowstorm. It was freezing. And you looked…” His eyes rested on the faint pulse of my neck. “Well, hot.”
“As you wish.” I slammed my teeth over the tip of his thumb, desperate to hurt him back. Tate grinned, placing his thumb in his mouth and sucking off the little blood I drew. “Now that’s a good girl.”
“I want you to relay this message to them.” I leaned forward. “I am a man of infinite darkness and no shadow. If they so much as breathe in my wife’s direction, forget touch, breathe, Hell’s Kitchen will earn its name. Their businesses will be demolished, their women raped and slaughtered, their children sold off to the highest fucking bidder. It’ll make the Battle of Towton look like child’s play. I will take no prisoners. There’s no red line I wouldn’t cross. They better remember that.”
will chase you to the end of the earth and beyond. No force in the world can keep me from you. I have earned your company fairly. The sooner you accept there is no way out of this arrangement, the better.”
“They’ll kill you.” I drove my fist to the door, cracking it. “Sounds like a plan. If I die, you’re not invited to the funeral.”
“I’d have made it to this wedding today if I had to swim my way from England.” “But…why?” “Because you’re the only thing I’ve ever wanted and couldn’t buy,” he admitted earnestly. “And because I’m utterly consumed by the idea of destroying your life, sweetheart.”
Two minutes ago, I wanted her like I wanted the sun. An erratic, prideful desire to own something exquisite and special. Now, I wanted her like I did my next breath. In a dull, unrelenting despair that consumed me.
It took another two seconds to register the cold, metallic edge kissing an artery in my neck and the fact that Gia was holding the small pocketknife I took with me everywhere. She must’ve fished it out of my pocket when she roamed my body. Her eyes danced like two flames, her gaze finding my own. Joke’s on you, Apricity. Now I’m even harder. “No bodyguards,” she said evenly. “You got us into this mess, you will get us out of it. You want me to be protected, you protect me. You’ve shown great capability tonight. Am I understood?” I stared, mesmerized. I’d never been this attracted to someone.
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“You secretly love that I am obsessed with you, don’t you, Gia? That my need for you is dirty and inappropriate, filthy in nature. A part of you has always wanted to spread those legs for me. Now the only question is whether you’re going to deprive both of us much longer.”
“Sweetheart, I’d never deliberately bring joy to anyone but you. You’re the only human I can stand.” The confession surprised me more than it did her. I didn’t hate her. I didn’t tolerate her. I liked her. Quite a fucking lot. A terrible complication, obviously.
“Listen to me carefully, Gia. I am yours. All of me belongs to you. My body—yours. Brain—yours. Money—yours. Kingdom—yours. Every inch. Every cell. Every atom. Every single breath has your name on it.” “And your heart?” Her voice came out scratchy and thick, eyes glittering with tears. “Is it mine too?” “Oh, Apricity.” I plastered my forehead to hers, gathering her into my arms. “If I had a heart to give, it would be yours. Without question.”
“You’ve never…” He swallowed hard. “You’ve never sucked cock before, Gia?” I shook my head, embarrassed. Tate tipped his head back and cupped his cheeks. “My fucking God, the woman that you are. You can snare me into death, and I’d say fucking thank you.”
“You give him hell, and he gives you back heaven.
“Just as I am incapable of loving you, I am also incapable of hating you. You could ruin my whole damn life, and I would still want you. Nothing you do or say could ever turn me away from you.”
Could someone broken put another person together? I guessed we had to wait and see.
Tears continued running down my cheeks. Tate chased them away with his tongue. “Don’t cry.” Kiss. “I’ll do anything to make you happy.” Kiss. “Rearrange constellations.” Kiss. “Pluck the moon from the sky.” Kiss. “I’ll buy you the fucking sun, Apricity.” Kiss.
“My real name is Gabriel,” he croaked, his silken voice coming from the depth of his soul. My heart stopped. “Gabriel Doe. And he—I—we love you. We’ve loved you from the first moment we saw you.”
“I love you.” I held his jaw in my hands, enunciating each word slowly. “I’ve always loved you. You are my White Rabbit. I’ll follow you to the ends of the earth and back, no matter how terrible and awful the world you led me to is. I think there’s something wrong with me. Because even when I tried to convince myself I hated you, I never could walk away.” “And you’re my Alice.” A rueful smirk tilted his lips. “Brave, adaptable, curious, confident. I knew it from the beginning, but hating you was so much easier than loving you. Because loving you meant admitting I might not get the one thing I
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“Apricity.” Tate’s hand scooped mine, warm and large against my cold, dry one. The mattress dipped as he shifted onto my hospital bed. He brought the back of my hand to his mouth, his lips brushing my skin. “Gia. Sweetheart. Wake up. Even in Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, she wakes up from her dream. She came back,” he croaked brokenly. “My love. Please come back to me. I’ll be better. No, that’s not good enough. I’ll be perfect. I’ll dedicate my life to worshipping you. You will have anything your heart desires. More airplanes. And islands. And…and…union perks!” he offered breathlessly.
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