The Girl He Used to Know

by Tracey Garvis Graves

“We had a conversation. It was short, but it was nice.” “There was a time when you wouldn’t have done that,” Tina says. “There was a time when I would have escaped out the back door and then taken to my bed for two days.”

It’s funny how the very trait that attracts you to someone is the same trait you can’t stand when you’re untangling yourselves from each other. And not funny ha-ha. Funny like how in the world could you not have seen it?

But maybe my failed marriage isn’t far enough behind me. That’s the thing no one tells you about divorce. No matter how much you and your spouse agree that the relationship is broken, it hurts like hell when you go your separate ways, and the pain follows you around until one day, it doesn’t.

“I can handle the academic load, but I volunteer twice a week in the Wildlife Medical Clinic and then there’s chess on Sunday night. That’s enough for me.” I required more downtime than most people. I needed to be able to read and sleep and be alone.

The next day, when I arrived at class, I took a seat on the other side of the lecture hall. Knowing how scared I was that Jake might seek me out, Janice attended the lecture with me. That’s the day I discovered what it felt like to have not only a friend, but a best friend.

“Don’t you want to wear it?” “I’m okay. It’s not that cold.” “I’m pretty sure it’s clean.” He picked it up and sniffed it. “It smells clean to me.” “I like the way it smells, but it has a tag in it. Tags bother me.” “Do you cut the tags out of all your clothes?” “It’s the first thing I do when I get them home.” Jonathan went back into the kitchen, and when he returned he had a pair of scissors in his hand. He cut out the tag and said, “Here. Try it now.” It was one of the nicest things anyone had ever done for me. I might not always understand what people are saying, but I know when they’ve been kind. “Thank you,” I said, pulling it over my head. “You’re welcome.”

I tried to fill my days with more social interaction, but that only left me feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. A personal connection with someone was what I craved the most. Someone who understood my needs and was willing to speak my language.

All I knew as I watched him drive away was that I started missing him before he’d made it halfway down the driveway.