Slaying the Holidays: A Dark Rom Com
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Read between December 24 - December 25, 2024
2%
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When I said "get a new hobby," I meant kayaking, not decking the halls with garlands of gore.
2%
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now I’m practically stalking the murderous golden retriever.
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Can he even hear me arguing for pottery classes over the electric carver? Oh, it's a bone saw? My mistake.
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Merry Christmas! I’m getting myself an accessory to murder.
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After a helpful talk with my beautiful divorce therapist, I decided to get into manslaughter.
2%
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We’d make the perfect couple if she’d stop threatening to call the FBI.
3%
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In a therapy first, I have a dead body on my office floor.
3%
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haven’t a clue what to do with a dead body, but this stranger acts like he sees them every Tuesday.
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“Who are you?” I ask.
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“Your ten o’clock. But if this guy is done, I’m happy to start early.”
4%
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So he’s a paramedic. Well, that explains his weird detachment and maybe even the disturbing sense of humor.
4%
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I also happen to have the peculiar habit of looking for signs of psychopathy in normal people.
4%
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Researching killers and psychopaths is not only disturbing to nearly everyone but also doesn’t pay well.
4%
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Soren sits in the chair that my last client unexpectedly vacated.
5%
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I’m uncomfortable with how attractive I find him.
5%
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“Sorry about that,” I say.
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“Why? You didn’t kill him, right?” He raises an eyebrow as humor sparkles in his pale eyes. I stare, again. Maybe there really is something off about him.
6%
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Guess someone’s ex didn’t like a sense of humor to lighten the mood. Then again, maybe she thought he was a psychopath too.
6%
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He isn’t flirting with me; he’s just European or something.
7%
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“Or try something you always wanted to get into but couldn’t for whatever reason.”
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“If you can concentrate on a new hobby, I think it would help you a lot.”
8%
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I have my own homework before his next appointment. Get laid so I stop flirting with him.
8%
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To say this date was a mistake is an understatement.
8%
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If Thomas came into couples therapy with someone, I’d pull the woman aside afterward and tell her to run.
8%
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Oh God, and the smell.
8%
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At some point, I had the bright idea to skip the chewing part and started to hide little pieces of my meal in a napkin so I could nibble on it later like a rat.
9%
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Maybe that’s weird, but I know it’s going to be delicious when I can eat it without the scent of unwashed ass tickling my palate.
9%
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I saw Thomas on my dating app and thought he looked similar to my new client. That’s why I swiped.
9%
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The idea might have crossed my subconscious that I could speed-dial Thomas after every appointment with Soren.
9%
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I’m turning into a pervert at thirty-two. Or maybe I was always a secret pervert like my barista is a secret psychopath.
12%
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Something shifts behind the driver’s seat. I gasp as pale eyes blink from the shadowy hiding space.
12%
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And that someone is Soren Erikson.
13%
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When coming across a murder scene, no one is prepared to see someone they know, but Soren is wearing leather gloves. Soren has a garrotte in his fist.
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“Shit. You’re going to scream,” he says,
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“That’s a good girl, Doctor Moore. We can’t let our emotions control our actions, right?”
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Fuck me, I was right. Soren isn’t normal.
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“Alright, I’ll leave therapy to you. By the way, your enormous fee wouldn’t include body disposal, would it?”
14%
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“Doctor Moore, we need to talk.”
15%
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Soren crowds me, pressing my back against the cold metal of an SUV. His arm wraps around my waist tightly as he pulls me into him.
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he grips my fist and shoves our hands into my coat pocket.
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Our fingers sink into gooey brie cheese and sticky cranberry jam. He stills for a second, shifting our hands in my pocket a little. Then he continues on with our kiss,
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My knees go weak, and Soren chuckles against my lips.
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It’s unfortunate I’m kissing him back.
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My ethical dilemma of lusting after a patient is suddenly overshadowed by kis...
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16%
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Maybe this was his entire plan since we first met. Stalk me, kill my date, and then drag me back to ...
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Honestly, no one’s ever made me anything before. That’s a level of commitment that’s as flat...
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What the hell am I thinking? He lets me rip away and looks down at me in surprise. I shouldn’t have moaned.
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“Are you stealing food from the restaurant?”
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“Weird,” he mumbles.
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“Leftovers are normal. Murder, how...
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