I realized almost immediately that I was asking the questions, raising the doubts, that I had promised not to ask in abandoning myself to the will of God. And I realized, too, that it’s one thing to give up such doubts and questions in a moment of grace and inspiration and spiritual insight, but another thing to prevent them from arising spontaneously when the harsh and rough circumstances of a moment of daily life drive from the mind everything except thoughts of here and now. So I did not feel ashamed of such doubts and questions; I simply recognized them for what they were and tried to
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