The Irresistible Urge to Fall for Your Enemy (Dearly Beloathed, #1)

by Brigitte Knightley

I’m off to bribe. And if Fairhrim refuses, I shall proceed with kidnap.” “A classic, sir.”

a classic is fucking funny

It took him two hours, but he triggered no wards, and didn’t kill anyone. Champion.

me trying to drive on tiger blvd

He was in Osric’s way, but Osric did not kill him.

me when i’m in a good mood

Osric had flayed a few people in the course of his career—his clients had to pay an additional fee for the service; it was messy work—but

brothers internal dialogue is actually fucking hysterical ur eating miss author

This felt, to Osric, like the right moment to begin to intrigue her. He pushed his hood back a little, so that she could see a bit of the Face. He tilted his head so that his cheekbone caught the light. His cleft chin clefted majestically. Who wouldn’t want to heal this?

me as confidence this is certainly based off draco

Osric’s deofol would now be able to find her directly to bear his messages; her deofol would likewise be able to find him. (He wondered what form her deofol would take. Something prickly, he wagered. A scorpion, probably.)

mmmmmm patronous inspo love that

It was hard, being perfect in an imperfect world, but Aurienne managed. If she had a flaw, it was that she was the Best, and she knew she was the Best. Some called it arrogance. She called it competence untainted by performative humility.

LITERALLY ME I SHOULD USE THIS AS MY INTRO

“Don’t drain yourself in the process,” called Cath. “I won’t,” said Aurienne. And she didn’t. No one controlled their seith like Aurienne Fairhrim.

one character change i’ve v much noticed is she does not have the false humility/self esteem issues hermione has. love that we have to two hard headed egotistical mcs. feels more realistic

She took a steadying breath as she did so; she hated waystone

mix of port key and apparition love

Unfortunately, he was chatty, and was determined to inflict his conversation upon her.

southerners.

A hirsute chimera wound its way across the pub’s faded sign, which had lost several letters, and advised Aurienne thus: SHAG HIM Aurienne received the instruction with hostility.

audibly giggled

“If only it was old age,” said Tristane. “The reality is far worse: it appears that he’s developed a conscience.” “No,” gasped Osric.

“Did it make your skin smooth, at least?” “As a baby’s bum.” “Like your brain, then.”

“Posture like a damp croissant.”

A DAMP CROISSANT.

The man had a colander on his head, which did not immediately inspire confidence.

“He hasn’t got any nipples,” noticed Osric. To Widdershins, he called, “Why haven’t you got any nipples?” “You can’t just ask people why they haven’t got nipples,” said Fairhrim.