Offside (Rules of the Game, #1)

by Avery Keelan

There were maybe two things that worked—some of the time—and that was it. Even then, it was about as reliable as a rain dance.

“Ah, so you do have a dirty mind.” “Dirty for you.”

“Baby, I can do all kinds of things to you that a little toy can’t.”

“Anyone ever tell you that you’re a dick?” he countered. I grinned. “All the time, man.”

“Where’s my autographed picture, Carter?” “My bad.” I grinned. “I guess we’ll have to hold a private photoshoot later.”

That’s not to say it was a bad type of nervous. It was more like a massively heightened state of awareness with a dash of idiotic happiness thrown in. And maybe a pinch of plain stupidity, as evidenced by what I’d just said. Sometimes, every shred of my game vanished around her.

“If you think that’s impressive, you should see me breathe. I’m world class.”

“You get out of a lot of trouble with that smile, don’t you?” “Sure do,”

“So you commit crimes habitually,” she said, fighting a smile. “Good to know.”

“This is so much better than the other kind of boarding,” I murmured, my attention falling to her full, kissable lips. “But now I’m going to get turned on every time I’m in this corner during a game.”

Scrambling to sit, I leaned an elbow on my bent knee and attempted to seem casual. The fact that I had a massive fucking hard-on made it a difficult task.

“It’s not a hockey game, James. I’m not keeping score.” He kissed my lips softly. “But if I was, I’d definitely want you to win.”

Legs that might be over my shoulders later, in a different way than last time. Or in both ways, maybe. Both would be great.

Now that I’d gotten her there with my tongue, I was confident I could do it with my hands too. And hopefully after that, with my favorite body part.

“You know what they say; hard work pays off.” “Oh, it did,” I said. “It definitely did.”

“You sped home to snuggle?” He shrugged. “I sped home to do whatever you want. But I have some ideas if you need suggestions.”

Christ. I felt sorry for chicks. Sometimes I wanted to mail a map of the clitoris and a fucking clue to other guys.

And I have the text version of blue balls.

I just might have to make a few sacrifices. Like sleep. Or possibly my sanity. You know, those minor negotiable things.

Going in there would be like announcing to the world that I was having sex. Not just sex, freaky sex. Or that I was masturbating, which I wasn’t keen on advertising, either.

They were gigantic. I didn’t even want to think about the amount of lube those would require.

I was pretty sure she had no desire for a veiny purple battery-operated cock.

It was about as cute and non-threatening as a sex toy could get.

And a six-hour battery life, which I couldn’t see using in one go, but good to know.

“What are you in the mood for?” “I’m not sure.” She shrugged, lips quirking. “What about you?” Opening that box and test driving the toy, but I wasn’t going to push my luck.

“We’re in public.” “Technically, we’re in a parking lot.

“Besides,” he added, “it would be a good excuse to squeeze in sleepovers.” “Do we need an excuse?” “I guess not.”

Why had no one yet invented brain bleach to erase disturbing pieces of information like that?

“Or maybe I should hire a hit man. It would be money well spent.” I couldn’t tell if he was serious.

“Got a thing for doors, Carter?” I peered up at him, biting back a smile. “There’s a bit of a theme going on here. Car doors, bedroom doors…” He grinned. “I can’t help it if they’re the perfect thing to pin you against.”

“Can’t I be curious about my wife-to-be’s wedding night attire? Good husbands take an interest in things, right?” “I think they mean things like their careers, not their panties.”

“You’ve already got the career part nailed. I’m marrying the sexiest sportswriter in the biz. So let’s circle back to your panties.”

“You already spoil me.” “Oh, that was nothing. I’m spoiling for two now.”