tried to catch her off guard, to scream out the truth at an unexpected moment. But you can’t surprise a thing that lives inside you. The screams came out of my throat as long, dry coughs. Help me, I was screaming inside, save me—but all anyone heard was a long ahem. Each day I would wake up and say to myself Today, no more of this nonsense. Today I am going to put all this craziness behind me and be a normal human being. And she would answer: But I love you, Amanda. I love you and I’m never leaving. Go! I would silently scream at her. Get out! Oh no, she would answer, I’m not going anywhere.
...more
