Blood of Hercules (Villains of Lore, #1)

by Jasmine Mas

I was jealous. If I had a muzzle, then people wouldn’t expect me to talk to them. I wonder if he’ll let me borrow it.

I would definitely not be asking if I could borrow his muzzle.

The closest I’d come to enjoyment was when Tim-Tom had gotten suspended from school for a week because he’d chanted “peace, love, and butt stuff” and started a mini riot in the halls.

God did not, in fact, hit me with his best shot.

“Yay, b-birds,” I said tentatively. “Go pigeons? They’re definitely not watching us and sending information back to the—” Patro left the room. That was weird, Alexis, even for you. Tone it down.

his hawk (government surveillance drone) stared at us.

General Cleandro, and he turned away from us to talk to her, but his hawk swiveled its head fully around and kept staring at us. Yep, that is 100 percent a robot.

Mental note—start praying for my soul. Aggressively.

I want whatever fancy Spartan antidepressants he’s on.

Mental note—physical exertion makes me homicidal. Avoid anything above a brisk walk.

Will I kill myself today dramatically or barely survive? Every day was a new mystery.

“Will do—Captain.” I bowed and face-planted onto the floor. “Like a beached whale,” I said with my cheeks pressed against the rocks. “Don’t worry, the tide will pull me back.”

I rolled to my side. Augustus looked worried. I made a whale sound. He did not make one back. This is why I don’t talk to people. They never understand me.

“You saved me?” I whispered up at him. Surprisingly long lashes fluttered. His expression softened. Fingers loosened. “You saved Big Bertha, the humpback whale.” He dropped me. I let out the cry (aquatic moan) of my people. In a surprising turn of events that absolutely no one saw coming, he didn’t talk to me for the rest of class.

Yay, not being murdered in a fit of rage. Wahoo. God is good.