Can't Get Enough (Skyland, #3)

by Kennedy Ryan

I’m only now realizing that often when people say “it’s funny,” they really mean that it’s… sad. A sad reversal of fortune. To have always been the parent. And now to be…

One of the hardest parts of aging is being the one “still standing” when everyone else has found their peace lying down.

“I read that the part of the brain that stores music, prayer, poetry, and art is the last and least affected by Alzheimer’s.”

In my twenties, I was just running. Always in the streets and for what? In my thirties, I started asking big questions and looking for answers. Now I know exactly who I am and what I want. And I can finally afford myself.”

Over his own happiness? I don’t say it aloud and neither does she, but it’s loud in the room. Is that love? Expecting him to become someone else for you? Forgo what that person knows will make them happy to be with you? Is that trade ever even?

“We are not magic,” she says. “We are resilient. It’s not a wand. It’s work. We work harder and shine brighter to survive. Excellence for us has been a matter of necessity. In a climate where less than half a percent of venture capital funding goes to Black women, women founders still perform sixty-three percent better than all-male founding teams in the first round. With those odds, we can’t leave our success to chance and we for sure can’t depend on magic.”

“Of course. I’d be surprised if you didn’t. Anything else intrigue you?” Too many wrong answers to that question, too.

There has been something inordinately intimate about every conversation we’ve had, even though there haven’t been many. He has managed to peel a layer back each time, exposing what only a few people ever get to see.

I don’t think his “have a good one” means the same as mine. Mine is a dismissal, a way to shut things down. When Maverick says have a good one, I think he really hopes I do.

The world isn’t designed for women like me. Women who’d rather be single literally for years than settle for a partner not worthy of her.

“I’m wearing pajamas.” “Throw on something.” “I don’t have on any makeup.” “Good. I love your natural skin.”

“I just washed my hair.” “Got a hat?” “When a Black woman tells you she just washed her hair, you should know that is a full-ass production and she ain’t going nowhere.”

No, I can’t blame Matthew for looking at Hendrix that way, but if he keeps it up, dude will be out of a job. That’s my girl. She just doesn’t know it yet.

I’m not inviting Maverick up. He’s not coming into my apartment. We’re saying goodnight right here in the car, and that’s it. “Nightcap?” he asks. “Sure,” I say unhesitatingly, shocking and kicking my own self in the ass.

Lmao meee

“The right one won’t ask you to give up your dreams, but will care just as much as you do about them.”

There are parts of you that want to be held, want to be needed and loved. That is just as emotionally valid as the parts of you that crave independence.

“That’s everything because that means I’m good to you and you’re good to me. Being good to you means wanting what’s best for you. If there is an upper hand, baby, I don’t want it. I know I’m asking you to take a big risk, but all I can do is promise that I’ll never try to hurt you and I’ll do everything to protect you. I’ll do everything in my power to make sure you don’t regret choosing me and I’ll protect your dreams as fiercely as I chase my own.”

“The technicalities of whether or not you broke some unspoken code won’t matter if Zere is hurt or angry,” Yasmen says, sympathy in her expression. “You have to be prepared for the fact that she may see this as a betrayal, even though technically it’s not. It won’t matter if you win on a technicality if she no longer feels she can work with you because you’re dating her ex-boyfriend.”

“I’m just so happy for you,” Soledad sniffs. “You’ve waited for someone who could truly be your match, and I feel like he could be, Hen.” “Lawd! Y’all some hussies. Were you this confident before you saw how fine he is half naked?” I ask dryly.

“Of course I helped Sol,” I say. “She’s my girl.” “And you’re mine.”

“You were the best,” she whispers. “You were the best for me and the fact that you’ve already moved on and given that to someone else breaks my heart.”

Girl booo. Y’all not getting back together is what you really should have been working out with your therapist. I get it, you’re hurt, but he didn’t cheat on you and you can’t be moving on and expect Mav to not.

As soon as our gazes catch, our lips start twitching and we both laugh, even though this is some tough shit we’re navigating.

“Once a thief, always a thief,” she says, her voice cooling even more to subzero. “If I couldn’t trust you with my man, you think I’d trust you with my business?”

But he’s not your man??????

“You and Maverick were no longer together when he and I started seeing each other.”

What I want, I go after, and what I go after, I usually get.” “I just bet you do. You got Maverick.” “Oh, I didn’t go after him. He came for me.”

Something else will come. Mama used to say You make the plan. God’ll make the way. We’ll see about that.

“Nothing’s more important and you can call anytime. I hope you believe me when I say that.” “I know. I’m not used to being—” “My priority?” “I was going to say ‘in a relationship.’” She manages a truncated chuckle. “But okay, that then.”

“You not helping!” she wails. “And he skis. Skis! What I’mma do with a skiing nigga?”

There’s some of that, but we been in that room wrestling, me and God. I been asking Him hard questions and not always sure I can live with the answers.”

“I love Him,” she says simply. “And I believe that He loves me and is working all things out for my good. That’s not always what’s easiest. Can you truly love someone you don’t trust? I don’t think so.”

“Let her walk into every room like a hymn sung high, a Black woman named Beloved, hips swaying like the gospel beat she was born to… I want love to arrive freely for her— like light breaking into a room at dawn, gentle but sure, a thing hers without labor.” —Frederick T. Joseph, “A Black Woman Named Beloved”

“But these two women are just as much my soulmates. They have been with me through the toughest times of my life. They have never wavered and have taught me what true friendship, what real sisterhood means. I thank you.”

“I want my love to be the most extravagant gift I ever give you,” he whispers, his voice deep and reverent. “I want it to be outrageously unconditional. I want it to overflow and spill into every crevice of your life, every corner of your heart because that’s what you do for me. You overwhelm me, Hendrix.”