Stalker Problems (The Society #1)

by Ivy Smoak

Single Girl Rule #10: All celebrations of important life events must involve strippers.”

"Definitely less than one percent. Finding a single guy like that is like finding a unicorn. And finding such a man with a nine-inch dick? That's like finding a unicorn with a nine-inch dick."

“I’m meeting to pleasure you.” He raised an eyebrow. “Well that’s rather forward of you.” What? Then I realized I had jumbled my words all around. Fuck my life. “Er…it’s a pleasure to meet you.” “I kind of liked your other greeting better.”

“I’m so sorry.” “I know. I could feel your remorse. Especially when you laughed and ran away.”

“It’s not actually a sex club. It’s an organization to help people find true love.” “Ew.” I frowned at him. “Ew? Why is that gross?”

“If there’s a Hogwarts-themed reading nook on the other side of that door I’m gonna lose my shit.”

“My secret is…” his voice trailed off. Say it. Please say it. “I’m in love with you, Ash. I’ve been in love with you ever since I first saw you months ago. And yes, I was the one stalking you, not the other way around.”

“If they didn’t show, I’ll be happy to fill in,” offered Nigel. “I’ve been working on a new single that is…what are the kids saying these days?” He stroked his wispy mustache. “It’s a bop. My bars are straight fire.”

For once in my life I want to have something real, even if it’s the last thing I do. You’re it for me, Ash. I love you.”