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I did that. I made those lips swell. I made those dark eyes water. I left my mark on him. Me.
While I may get violent with Huckslee because I’m forced to, the thought of anyone else touching him pisses me off. He’s mine to torment. No one else’s.
“That glare is reserved for me. You’re giving it to everyone else, and I’m jealous.”
This can be like neutral ground or something. A fake place. Like…Delaware.”
“You’re fucking cute when you’re flustered,” I blurt out, cutting off his rant, and my smile grows when his lips part at my words. His dark eyes widen, twinkling like a starry night sky as he flounders like a fish for something to say.
“I want to see you.”
“But I want to talk to you, and you don’t trust me right now. So we’re going to Delaware.”
“Why do you hate me so much, Taylor?”
“I don’t hate you, Huck. Not even close.”
“Then what? Why have you made my life fucking hell the last few years? Was it because of what happened in eighth grade? Becau...
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“Why? Because you kissed me? Because you liked it?”
“Don’t.”
“Or what? You’ll break my other arm?!” With a scoff, I turn away. “This is pointless. I’m fucking done trying to find something good in you. Your friendship would have been enough even if you didn’t like me that way, but I’m just a fucking qu...
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“Shut the fuck up, H...
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Before I can process what’s happening, he’s spinning me around and crushing his mouth to mine. It’s like an electric shock to my senses, the feel of hi...
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“So tell me why you turned into such a jackass,”
“After the eighth grade. Why did you hate me so much?”
“I was a little...obsessed...
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“Even more so after we...kissed. My father kind of caught on and made some comments, pretty much told me that if he caught us hanging ou...
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“Your ...
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“Yeah. So I pretended to hate you even though I didn’t. And I guess, over the years, it just kind of became easier to lie to myself, too. Because I...we couldn’t be a...
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“God, I’m so fucking stupid.” I laugh humorlessly as I turn on my heel, heading back toward the house. “Despite all the shit you’ve done to me, I pined after you for years. Years. You really couldn’t care less about anyone but yourself, Taylor.”
“Me? Judge you? How many times have you called me names because of my sexuality? Or my grades, or my clothes? I’m the golden boy, right? With the rich daddy? Or am I the fucking sissy bottom bitch, fairy boy queer, Taylor? Because I can’t keep it all straight anymore.”
“I don’t like seeing someone else’s marks on you,”
I hate how much I miss him. Hearing his dumb music from the bathroom when he showers every night, his messy curls when he comes down the stairs first thing in the morning. Seeing him in the halls at school, watching him at football practice. Fighting with him. His voice. The kisses…
But your the one pushing him away every time
“You weren’t there,” I accuse softly, gripping the handlebars. He must not have heard me because he tilts his head and steps closer. “I don’t know what we are, Huckslee. Maybe at one point, I did, but all of that changed. And I know I can’t undo everything I’ve done, but I almost fucking died, and you weren’t there.”
“Taylor doesn’t really like anyone, honestly. Except his close friends.”
“He likes you.”
“Yeah, no. Pretty sure he...
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“...
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“I saw the way he looked at you. Pretty sure your stepbrother is in ...
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Huckslee Davis, jersey number twenty, currently in his fourth and final season playing for the California Golden Bears at CU Berkeley.
Fuck, even sad, he’s adorable. Makes me want to make him hot chocolate and shit. Tuck a blanket around him. Sit on his face.
“I didn’t get a choice in coming out, so why should he?”
“I don’t…I don’t know.”
“I don’t have a lot of experience, okay? I’ve only ever been with one guy, and he’s the only one I’ve ever...felt like that with. The only guy I’ve ever thought about in that way, so I don’t know if bi is the right word for it?”
“Either way, I don’t think I need to put a name t...
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“Huck, I never hated you. In fact, I really fucking liked you, okay? Like a lot. Remember when I explained all of this at the track?”
“Kneel.”
“W-what,”
“You want my forg...
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“Beg for it on your fucking kne...
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“Don’t make me ask again.”
Damn huck
“Are you ready to beg?”
“I like the sight of you like this. Kneeling and waiting for my cock.”
“Is this what you wanted, Taylor?” He grits out, voice like gravel. “To be violated while someone takes away your choice to breathe?”
“Now you know what it’s like to drown.”
We’re not...we’re not anything to each other. Just each other’s first kiss and first love. First and only person to ever break your heart.
We’re no good for each other, and yet I Can’t Let Him Go.
“Huckslee, I’ve been in love with you since the eighth grade.”
