The Love Haters

by Katherine Center

“I’d so much rather just march confidently around town, not giving a shit what anybody thinks—and I do!

Every time you have to be brave, you get to be a little braver next time.

You’re like a human hot-fudge sundae or something.”

“I’m saying that when I’m not with you, I’m thinking about you. And waiting to see you again. And we’ve spent all day, every day together for weeks now—and it already feels like it’ll never be enough.”

“You’re not not forgettable,” Hutch said then, like I was being obtuse. “You’re unforgettable.” I held my breath at that.

“You’re a TV jingle you never wanted to learn, but can’t erase. You’re a puzzle that can’t be solved—or a question that can’t be answered—or a dream you wake up from that feels like it really happened. But it didn’t happen. And it can’t happen. Because that’s not how dreams work.”

That’s when Hutch took a deep breath and let it out. “I’m trying,” he said then, “really, really hard … not to kiss you.”

“Love is the worst.” But he was smiling at me. “It makes you jealous. And possessive. And desperate. It upsets your orderly life. It haunts you, and worries you, and gets you drunk with your brother. It tempts you. It makes you say yes when you should say no, and it stops you from saying yes when that’s the only thing you want to do. It keeps you up all night with worry, and then makes you run out of fuel because you can’t stop searching for a woman on a sinking houseboat.”