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Because it was too hard to see my world for its good when its bad was so much louder and more distracting.
I feel sick and cold and tired and like I will never eat again, my hair hurts and my muscles are sore and my brain is completely empty and my heart is hollow. I feel like I was just in the car crash all over again.
As he does, he sees what’s on the screen. “Oh, fuck’s sake,” he says.
“I’m the only one who knows,” she says, her tone softening. “I’m the only one who was there. And since I haven’t been here to blame, you blamed yourself. But it wasn’t your fault. Neither of us were perfect. We were doing our best.”
Instead, I have a good night. I get kissed in the snow. I eat chocolate in bed. I make plans for tomorrow.

