You’ve changed. We all change. The Odysseus who comes back to Penelope isn’t the Odysseus who left, not exactly. But he comes back, because there’s a continuity. I’m not identical to the young man who was me thirty years ago. Of course not. But he’s not a different person. That tree’ – he pointed with some force – ‘was that tree thirty years ago and it’ll be the same tree thirty years from now. You’re thinking about your father while you’re here, like before, with your mother. Mourning is all about continuity. A continuity has been broken, and that’s painful. But memory is continuous.
