Always You and Me

by Dani Atkins

‘Please, Lily. For me. Go and see him. Listen to what he has to say. And then, when you’ve heard it . . . forgive him. And then forgive me.’

Why????

Adam Tennant – my husband, my best friend, and the love of my life – simply stopped being.

I learnt that you can’t outrun grief because it always knows where to find you, but you can keep yourself so busy that it can only squeeze into the gaps of your life, instead of burying you under an avalanche of sadness.

‘Wildwood Furniture,’

Is this him looking for Josh?

The prospect of spending so much time in his company would once have been my idea of Heaven, but now it felt like a stay in a considerably hotter location.

I'm so curious as to why he acts like he hates her so much...

It was a timely reminder – if one was needed – that it was a very long time since this man had loved me.

I think he still does....

Some threads run so deep in your tapestry, perhaps it’s impossible to ever unpick them all.

Josh might have conveniently forgotten that he’d hidden the fact that he was in love with me until the very worst moment that he could ever have revealed it. But I hadn’t.

AND HE STILL IS

long ago, his eyes, hands and tongue had travelled over most of it.

Wait so they actually got together at some point

‘I thought I’d remembered everything about you,

Everything?

‘It’s as if you magicked him up from your past,’ Andie declared dramatically. ‘Like voodoo.’

I was thinking the same damn thing

He was the boy who’d stolen my heart without having the faintest idea that a theft had taken place.

‘The best man won, didn’t he . . . and then he got to be the groom.’

Oh sweet boy

glimpse of a body I never thought I’d see unclothed again.

Did they sleep together right before her wedding?

‘We can start there if you like, although there’s not much to see. Just a load of wood and tools.’

Why doesn't he want her to see it???

‘It was a commission piece, but it fell through.’

Omg it was Adam.... He comissioned it didn't he

‘I’m still torn between punching the guy on the nose for breaking your teenage heart all those years ago, and buying him a drink to thank him for being so blind he still doesn’t realise he’s let the best girl in the world slip through his fingers.’

Oh that's why he was drunk i bet....

‘I love you, Lily. I’ve always loved you. There’s never been anyone else in my heart except you. And yes, I know this is the worst possible time to be telling you this. But better now than after you’ve gone through with it. I had to come. I had to stop you marrying the wrong guy, even if he is Mr Right, Mr Nice Guy, Mr Good Guy. He’s not the one you’re meant to be with. You’re meant to be with me.’

I couldn’t let you walk down the aisle without letting you know that there’s someone else who also wants to spend his life with you.’

‘Actually, there’s something I need to sort out for later. Would you mind if I left you on your own for a bit?’

Is this Adam knowing Josh came and he's gonna scare him off?

‘I no longer need to know how you feel about me . . . about anything, because I realise I’ve made a mistake.’

Adam definitely got to him

‘I realised I wasn’t in love with you after all.’

BULL. SHIT.

‘You built my treehouse.’

I'm gonna cry

Why would a man who claimed to have no feelings for you, build your dream treehouse in the middle of a forest you were never meant to visit?

‘Lily, I’m all for being self-confident, but you really need to get over yourself.

The gaslighting is real

‘We will write to you each year to see if you would like us to continue to store your frozen sperm.’

Is she gonna have his kid??

‘Adam realised the only thing that would ever make me walk away was knowing you were having his baby.’

He won't. Not now.

‘No idea. I picked it from a chart on the wall because I liked the shapes. But if I had to take a guess, it’s most likely Chinese for “Stupid drunk idiot”.’

Bullshit. He knows what it means. It's something to do with her.

‘Just you and me, one last time, my love,’

He looked up into Adam’s face and smiled.

It took me a second to realize he just looks like Adam and they didn't name him Adam