Just Bromantically Invested (Accidental Love, #4)

by Saxon James

I sometimes worry that I get more out of our friendship than he does and that he’ll get sick of me one day. I don’t think I’d ever recover from that. I need Penn. He’s my best friend. I love him … too much.

Some days, it feels like I have to fight for his attention when I’d never make him fight for mine.

When people say they don’t give a fuck, it’s because I have them all. The fucks, I mean. I give entirely too many fucks every single day, and things like this going wrong send my anxiety skyrocketing.

I wish they’d all fuck off and let me do my job. I’m Madden’s best friend. They don’t need to worry about him when he has me.

Xander has … well, he has us. And anxiety. He’s practically married to that bitch.

“Don’t get me wrong, I want to lose my virginity. I want to be fucked in every way I can be fucked, but I’d like to be thrashed respectfully, thank you very much.”

“Because loving someone who doesn’t love you back is the hardest fucking thing in the world to go through. It tears your heart into itty-bitty shreds. You don’t want to tear his heart into itty-bitty shreds, do you?” She gives me a soft smile. “Good luck.”

The need to go after him is strong. The need to cry is deeper though. Because I’m suddenly terrified I just fucked everything up.

I’ve disappeared for almost an entire day, and there’s no single person who’s noticed. No one to check in on me, no one who cares. That’s a dark thing to realize. Madden’s all I have. And I ruined it. I crawl into the shower and let myself cry.

If this is what friendships are … I wish I’d had them a long time ago.