Cheap Heat (Goliaths of Wrestling #3)

by Lily Mayne

“Sorry, bro,” Larkin said sheepishly. Then, after a pause, as my buddies’ characters watched on in silence, his elf stepped forward and began crouching repeatedly, directly over my dead archer’s face. His friend Hans cackled. “Noice. Classic teabag, bro.”

“You can just leave it, hon,” the fae said in a sympathetic voice as he and my best friend watched me jerk off a werewolf dildo suctioned to the floor of a sex shop at 10 a.m. on a Friday morning.

“Um, yeah, it’s cool. No worries. I don’t mind. Hey, Seb,” he said abruptly in an overly chirpy voice. “I just remembered I need to… move those boxes in the storage room. Do you, uh, want to—” “Yep.” Seb took the phone from Larkin’s hand and swiftly passed it to Taylor, before the pair of them turned and strode out of the room. “Right.” Holt cleared his throat and looked back down at his tablet. “Well, let’s all avoid the storage room for the next hour or so. Anyway, on to the rest of the matches…”

I should’ve just stayed with Frank and Beans, knocking back shots until I passed out. Beans had told me I was ‘one of them’ now. I should’ve just embraced it. I could become their third and spend my days wearing tighty-whities and karate-chopping random objects. Change my name to Coleslaw.

“Daaaan!” Vince screamed, reaching for me desperately, nails scrabbling over the floorboards. My eyes widened in horror. I dropped the framed painting and lunged, landing on my belly with a grunt and snagging Vince’s fingertips just before he vanished into the darkness under the dining table. “Don’t let go, Dan,” he croaked. “I’ll never let go,” I rasped back. “I promise.”

“Oh wait, I think I have one more.” Beans casually aimed his paintball gun at Vince’s crotch and shot before any of us could react. “Hnnnngh.” Vince doubled over, clutching his junk. After a few seconds of whimpering, he wheezed, “Got me right in the nuts.”

Vince turned and fisted my shirt, gazing up at me. “We can’t ever tell anyone about this, Dan.” I nodded and croaked, “I know.” “No one. Ever. We’re bound by something stronger than blood now, man.” I nodded again quickly, still dazed. He exhaled a shaky breath and slowly released my shirt, then flung his arms around me. “I love you, man.” “I love you too, bro.” I squeezed him tight, admitting in a small voice, “That was so scary.”

“Sorry. I’m just a little emotional. Beans did a jig on my back.”