March 5th Finally, after all this time, she’s right here. I can barely breathe thinking about it. I watched her yesterday, just for a moment too long, but she didn’t notice—or maybe she did, and just pretends not to. Christ, I hope she does. What does she think of me? Does she see it? This thing between us? She said something about the meeting with Dr. Lawrence, a colleague attending this conference with us, but I can’t remember a word she said. Her voice is like a melody, so soft, so soothing, but it makes me anxious, restless. How does she do that? It’s not normal. I’m not normal. Nothing
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