Scythe & Sparrow

by Brynne Weaver

“You look like a TV doctor. Dr. McSpicy or something. What are your credentials?”

“Doc is definitely one of those CrossFit guys. My husband calls him Dr. Beast Mode.”

“To be honest, I was relieved it wasn’t the raccoon again. Do you know how hard it is to get a codeine-addicted raccoon out of a ventilation system? Fucking hard.”

“Fucking Barbara,” he hisses. I grab a crutch and hop up onto my good foot. “Yeah, fucking Barbara. Let’s fuck her up,” I say, whipping my knife from the sheath at my back. “Who’s Barbara?” “The raccoon.”

“It wasn’t really by choice. But I’d take a raccoon to the face for you any day, Rose Evans.”

“So cute yet so murdery,” I say, stuffing the gloves in my back pocket. “I think we’re kindred spirits, Barbara.”

“Except for right now. With all due respect, Dr. Kane,” I say as I fold one hand behind his head, “shut the fuck up and eat my pussy.”

“It’s okay to love your darkness and still love yourself. It doesn’t make you a bad person. It makes you a whole one.”