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“Aren’t you worried I’ll, I don’t know, corrupt you or something?” “Nope. You won’t ever have that kind of control over me.”
I want to agree with that because I don’t think we should be friends. We should be boyfriends.
“A neurotic rambler and a neurodivergent recovering addict walk into friendship…”
it could also just mean that Alexei is here and making my heart thwack.
Gage Rossum is my soulmate. I just need to be patient until he figures it out.
“It’s my old soul.” I smile at him. “That was created for the single purpose of belonging to Gage’s soul. And vice versa.” He smiles, eye-rolls, laughs, and nods all at once. “He’s the one, eh?” “Just need him to figure it out.”
“You’re worth everything I have to give, Alexei.”
I’m more than just a junkie. I have a past that isn’t all about drugs and sex and crimes. I’m known for funny and kind things as well as bad things, and I never fucking realized that until this very moment.
I’m more than an addict.
“I know we’re doing everything backwards, but I’m trying not to fall in love with you so soon.” Instead of being spooked, Gage laughs. “Don’t try too hard.” He smirks.
“No more hiding, Gage. We’re family. Family supports family, no matter what we’re going through.”
said I needed to be prepared for the level of intimacy it’d bring, but fuck me, all I want is intimacy with him. And not just the sexual kind. I want to hold him and snuggle him. I want to laugh with him and sleep next to him. I want to get so caught up in a make-out session with him that we forget to eat and my lips hurt after. I want to differentiate him from a fixation, love on him without obsessing over him, and learn new ways to make him smile every single day.
We’ll fade away together, but not because of each other.”
He’s mentioned being a little dark-minded before, but when I look at him, I don’t see darkness. I see nerves and insecurity. I see a man determined to be better without actually knowing what better looks like. I see his sexy self-awareness and how hard he’s trying to make me feel special, not because he has to try, but because he knows I’m special and wants to ensure I know that he knows.
I’m that shadow that clouds sunshine and the toxin that spoils freshness. I’m a bad omen in a smiling package, and I don’t even know if my smile is real or if it’s forced.
It’s a relationship, built together because… you made me believe in soulmates. I just wanted you to believe in me, too.”
I think he really is my soulmate, and it gives me a silent strength, like something inside me solidifies and becomes more defiant.
“You’re my sober dope, Alexei. My feel-good drug. And instead of you being a substance or a thing I can overindulge in or abuse, you’re the best kind of dope because you tell me when to stop.”
He’s my perfect person, and if I had to pick him out of a lineup, blindfolded and deaf, I’d always gravitate to him because our souls really are connected.
“That after all this time and all the bullshit I’ve put myself through, here you are, right when I needed to find you.”
