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Motherfucker, I see you! I have always seen you. Even when I close my eyes to sleep, I see your damn face and those tragically beautiful eyes.”
His hands tremble as I flip them over, exposing his wrists, and rub his piano key tattoo with the pad of my thumb. “I see this too, Marley. I’ve noticed the faint line under.”
The sad reality of the situation is, Marley isn’t ready to admit we’re endgame and my need for Marley Banks has grown so much it has been a complication. No, not a complication, a sick obsession demanding to be fed before it twists into something threatening to annihilate me.
“You want this, Marley. You yearn for this, but you’re too frightened to admit it. I’m not delusional. If all you can give me are these stolen moments, right now, then I’ll take it, because to an addict, one hit is better than a lifetime of going without.”
“Your mouth can spew all the fucking nonsensical denial you want. You can choke me to compose the burning need you have churning in every fiber of your being. I’ll let you fuck your pain away in any capacity you want.”
Grabbing his hand, I turn it over and lick his tattoo. “I will be your damn doggie on a chain. I will give you control over my body in order to bring your mind a semblance of peace. But I’m done letting you run away from me. From us.”
“I’m here, Marley. Use me. Choke me until you are no longer drowning.”
“I’ll let your fingers be the brush strokes turning my body blue and purple if it means I get all of you.”
“I’m broken,” I whisper. My confession has the opposite effect to what I intended. Iggy leans forward and brushes his lips along my neck. “I’ll put you back together.”
“I want you more than I want food, water, or air,” Iggy growls in my ear.
No one has ever turned me on like Iggy. Not once since I started having sex has it been an all-consuming fire like it is with him.
“Shut your mouth and move your hand quicker. I’m going to cum in your dick, then I’m going to let it drip on the floor before forcing you to clean it up like the good little cum dump you are.”
“Fuck, why do I love it when you talk to me this way? Anyone else would’ve gotten a broken jaw, but with you, I want it. I crave both your words of degradation and praise. What have you done to me, Marley? What have you done and why can’t I break free?”
“Pretty whores don’t clean up their depravity. They wear it on their faces like a badge of honor.”
“I’m going to tear this tight little ass apart. I’ll make you my little bitch. Have you salivating like a dog to get fucked over and over by this dick.”
“I’m gonna take my ass whenever I want. All I have to do is say the word and you’ll get on all fours like a bitch in heat and present yourself to me.”
“Listen, Marley, I let you plow into my ass like it’s a field and you’re a farmer, but there ain’t no way I’m going to be the little spoon.”
With Marley, it was different. Waking up with that man in my arms, his legs twisted with mine, had me wanting to chase that feeling of happiness forever. I was so far gone I would have put a ring on his finger and made him mine for eternity. He, however, didn’t want more. That’s the problem. I’d take the crumbs he’d give me and be his dirty little secret, because something with that man was better than anything else I could have had in life.
He’s sporting a collar around his neck, a clear sign he wants to be someone’s pet. Too bad for him, he’s already owned. By me.
“I’m right here, baby. You want to act like a little bitch, Iggy, then I’ll fuck you like one. Now get on your knees like the dog you are.”
“This ass is mine. If you ever threaten to let anyone else fuck it again, I’ll tear it apart and make it useless. You hear me, boy?”
“You, I fuckin’ belong to you. My dick only gets hard for you. Your ass is the only one I want to be in. All I do is think about tearing this tight little hole apart. I want to come deep in your ass and watch as I leak out of you. Knowing I’m the only man that’s ever fucked your asshole is the sexiest thing I can think of. I’m fuckin’ yours, Iggy. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be but in you.”
The anger I feel toward him twists in me, unleashing some sort of beast who wants to claim every part of him. I want to lock him away from the world and keep him safe. There is a vise in my heart so strong I’m scared it will crush me. A vise he placed there and now, there’s nothing I can do to rid myself of it.
“How dare you make me love you!” As soon as I say the words, my head falls back and I come down Marley’s throat with a groan.
Marley Banks could make the heavens weep, gazing at his beauty. I’m gazing at the pierced, tattooed version of David or any other inspiration that caused Michelangelo to carve perfection from marble. Even now, with misery and fatigue etched on his face, Marley Banks takes my breath away.
Marley Banks loves me. He has an undying love for me. His feelings for me are eternal, transcending time and space. Oh god, I sound like a sixteen-year-old with his first crush. Marley makes me feel like I’m sixteen, holding my breath for the person I like to like me back. Hearing him profess such weighted emotions is a high of its own. A high nothing could ever bring down.
“I love you, Iggy. A world without you is a world I don’t want to live in. As fucked up as I am, I can stand it all, but what I can’t stand is losing you. I want a life with you. The whole thing. Picket fences, a dog, and maybe even a kid. Marry me, Iggy. Marry me. Be my husband.”
Marley laughs. God, I’ll never tire of the sound. If I hear nothing but this man’s laugh for the rest of my life, I’d be happy.
