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“Damn, girl! Your ass is so fine it jiggles even more than that weird jelly thing your aunt brings to holiday meals.”
“Damien the Devil Egg,”
He’s handsome, for an egg.
Round features with full cheeks that dimple when he smiles. Succulent lips rest just above a softly squared jaw. Large eyes of shamrock green look down at me...
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I’ve never kissed a man like him before. He’s so solid under my hands,
a part of me was scared he would taste sulfuric or curdled. In reality, his kiss is warm and salty, like creamy fresh mozzarella.
My egg man is ready to get fully undressed, and show me just how hard boiled his body really is.
Muscles carved from a diet of lean protein are covered in curls of green hair that smell like chives.
Tattooed pecs and biceps flex
NO HE HAD A TATTOOED PENIS AS WELL. HELP
as thick as a baguette and nearly as long.
Girl you’re going to die
Beating the beastly thing like he’s making an omelet, he strokes down to the tuft of pubic herbs before squeezing back up. The egg-shaped head tipped with tiny horns glistens as he fists himself.
:/
With a guttural roar, the devil in my egg comes to life.
he flips me over like a spatula on a frying pan.
His herbal pubes soak up my juices and release a fragrant scent into the air.
I might throw up. Somehow this is a worst sentence than any splatterpunk I’ve ever read
His tattoos, his horns, his muscles, everything about him screams that he’s a bad egg through and through, and I love him for it.
HELP
“CLUCK CLUCK,”
No… no this isn’t… safe word… :(
succession of beads being pulled so quickly
YEOWCH
Creamy and spicy, it’s the most decadent thing I’ve ever tasted.
I’m gonna be sick
delicious. I look over and see Damien filling the last one with his secret sauce. Squeezing the tip of his cock, a charming little flower of filling swirls into the boat. Setting it down beside the rest, he takes a pinch of paprika and sprinkles the spice effortlessly onto the top. The final touches have him reaching for my kitchen shears, which he uses to clip a bit of chives from the space just above his balls.
…somehow I didn’t see this coming… and I wish I didn’t have to read it…
“So, what’s in this secret sauce? I’m pretty good at discerning flavors, and I’m curious if it’s nut-based.”
She fed this shit to her friends…
