The Let Them Theory

by Mel Robbins

Once you start the countdown, 5-4-3-2-1, there’s no turning back.

remember what a revelation it was when I thought to myself, Wait a minute, I can feel horrible and still do what I need to do? Yes, Mel, you can. And it worked.

The 5 Second Rule taught me that action is the answer. Thinking about your problems will never solve them. Waiting around to feel like doing something means you’ll never do it. It taught me that no one is coming to save you. You must save yourself from yourself. You have to force yourself to make little moves forward, all day, every day, especially when you don’t feel like it.

The truth is, other people hold no real power over you unless you give it to them.

So much time and energy is wasted on forcing other people to match our expectations. And the truth is, if somebody else—a person you’re dating, a business partner, a family member—if they’re not showing up how you need them to show up, do not try to force them to change. Let Them be themselves because they are revealing who they are to you. Just Let Them and then you get to choose what you do next.

No matter how hard you try, you will never be able to control or change another person. The only person you are in control of is you. Your thoughts, your actions, your feelings.

Let Me makes you realize that you are in control of what happens next and that life is more fun and fulfilling when you’re not sitting alone in your superiority.

The point here is, every situation is different, but one thing remains the same: You always get to choose how you respond.

And while you’ve been busy comparing yourself to everyone else, you’ve missed one of the greatest secrets in life: Other people teach you how to be a better player, and that’s how you win.

Because other people are never going to stop you from achieving what’s meant for you. They can’t. Only you can stop yourself from achieving it.

So whoever it is that’s triggering you, Let Them. Let Them irritate you. Let Them burn you up. And Let Them show you EXACTLY what you want and what you need to be doing to get there.

You have a beautiful and amazing life to live. You have potential beyond your imagination. You are not limited by where you live, or the circumstances you are facing, or the aspects of your life that you believe are limitations.

How exciting is it that the most meaningful moments of your life and the deepest connections are just around the corner?

Loving people means that you have to meet them where they are.

Believe in their ability to heal, and create an environment where change is possible.

They Don’t Like You. Wake Up.

Do not accept the table scraps.

Let Me take my power back, because the love of my life is right around the corner.

Ask yourself, is this going to require me to give up on a dream? Because according to the Gottmans, if it does, that’s a problem.

If you know what your dreams are in life, you deserve and need relationships that support you in achieving them.

You Are the Love of Your Life

A relationship doesn’t make you worthy of love. Your existence does.

You will spend your entire life from the day you are born to the day you die with only one person: you. You are the only love of your life.

Let Me prioritize my own happiness. Let Me pursue my dreams with passion. Let Me set boundaries that protect my peace. Let Me choose relationships that uplift and inspire me. Let Me love myself enough to walk away when it no longer works.

The sky’s beauty isn’t diminished by the presence of clouds or storms. In fact, it’s the variety, the unpredictability, that makes it truly magnificent.