Dr. K is one of the leading voices on motivation and behavior change. He told me, point-blank, that pressuring other people backfires because “you don’t understand the way people are wired.” What you need to know, according to Dr. K, is simply that a human being will always feel like choosing what is pleasurable now and avoid what feels painful. In the moment, the work it takes to change is painful and hard. That’s why no one is motivated to change—even when they know it’s good for them in the long run.
