The Let Them Theory: A Life-Changing Tool That Millions of People Can't Stop Talking About

by Mel Robbins

My life didn’t change because of one thing that I did; it changed because of the thousands of mornings where I woke up and didn’t feel like getting out of bed, but I 5-4-3-2-1 made myself do it.

The reality is, no matter how hard you try or what you do, you cannot control other people. And yet, you live your life as if you can. You live as though, if you say the right things, people will like you. If you keep taking on more work, your boss will respect you. If you act in the right way, and cater to what your mom wants, and also keep your friends happy, somehow you’ll find peace. You won’t.

If you’re struggling to change your life, achieve your goals, or feel happier, I want you to hear this: The problem isn’t you. The problem is the power you unknowingly give to other people.

The time that you have with the people that you love is like a melting ice cube. One minute, it’s there . . . . The next, it’s gone. And here’s the sad truth: You and I, we can’t stop the ice cube from melting. The only thing we can do is make the most of the time that we have with the people that we love while we have it.

You can waste years of your life being distracted by meaningless things or late nights at work. It’s easy to get yourself so stressed out about life that you forget the entire point is to live it.

You’ll never reach the full potential of your life if you continue to allow stupid things or rude people to drain your life force.

You are never stuck. That’s a lie you tell yourself. You can leave a job, a relationship, a living situation, a date, an interview, or a conversation anytime you want to.

My opinion may be negative, but I am allowed to have it.

At some point, you’re going to realize that your parents aren’t going to be here forever, and that this was their first time as a human being too.

As long as you let other people’s emotional immaturity dictate your choices, you’ll always come last in your own life.

If kids are not allowed to experience the full wave of emotion (without an adult saying “calm down” or “this is silly” or “you’re overreacting”), they never learn how to process normal human emotions in a healthy way. Instead, they become an emotionally immature adult who takes it out on the rest of us.

You can’t let your emotions drive your decisions, because they will often stop you from making the right decisions.

As people come in and out of your life, Let Them. Trust the timing.