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Hollis had taken enough hits in his life that he’d gotten good at making them miss.
The thing about being friends with only girls was that they held him accountable for his actions. He got scolded and berated and pushed to be better. But he also got Band-Aids.
There was no joy in this violence, just pain and humiliation.
“Maybe if you weren’t a bitch, people would punch you less,” James muttered. “Exactly!” Hollis cried. “I get punched way too often for that to even be considered a viable motive for anything.”
“You’re enough as you are,” Walt said. Hollis huffed humorlessly. “Is that your way of saying that you’re lonely?” Walt shrugged. “Aren’t we all?”
Human beings had been afraid of falling in holes for as long as there had been holes and human beings.
You seem calmer. That’s good. It will pass,
A liability is only halfway there. I was full-time trouble, sweetheart.
You’re just a house I’m haunting. You’re a house, Hollis.
Every instance of Walt’s amusement felt like being taunted, his irritation like a threat, his ennui an insult.
Sitting in the dark of himself, both a witness and a hostage, violently aware that his heart picking up speed had nothing to do with how Walt was feeling.
He tipped his head back, the way he always did when his heart was breaking.
Like original sin, like the bite of an apple, like staring into first sunrise before you learn to look away, like touching the hem of an angel, like milk hot from skin, like licking honey from the fingertips of God.
I know every inch of me, Walt. I was me before we were us.
You’re unholy. I know. We suit each other.
He wanted to tear Walt out of him so he could eat him back up like a beast. He wanted and wanted until it made him feel grotesque.
I slid into your body like putting on an old jacket, Hollis, but I’ve had practice. I’ve had time to learn how to do it right. Back then, I tore them apart and didn’t even know I was doing it.
It placed a hand on their shoulder, gentle, and leaned forward close enough to kiss, then tore Walt out of Hollis’s body like a poison.
