Rewind It Back (Windy City, #5)

by Liz Tomforde

My heart flutters like it used to before I remember everything that happened. Because I may have loved Rio DeLuca once, but I don’t anymore.

“I pick a song when something cool or important happens so I can remember it. Then when I want to relive a moment, I rewind it back and start the song from the beginning.”

She used to steal all my thoughts. She used to occupy my entire existence. I almost forgot what that felt like. I’ve spent six years subconsciously comparing every date to her. Comparing their laugh to hers. Their kindness to hers. Their confidence to hers. Their taste in music to hers.

That thing I’ve been looking for since I moved to Chicago? That connection? That one person some search their entire lives to find? I had already found her when I was twelve years old. At least, I thought I had. I know what I’m looking for because I had it once, and now the only girl I’ve ever loved is moving into the house next to mine. Again.

“The guy you were with tonight.” I slowly shift back to face her. “Who was he?” The set in her jaw is evident even from here. “Not your job to worry about.” Nodding, I turn back to my house, hands casually tucked in my pockets as I continue to walk. With my back to her, I make sure my words are loud enough for her to hear them. “Lose him.”

“Well, maybe that was the first time you were told, but I know for a fact it wasn’t the first time someone liked you.”

“I’m going to do it!” His tipsy grin is way too big. “I’m going to go ask for her number.” “Hey, Rook?” He looks my way, so stupidly excited. “Yeah?” “Sit the fuck down.” “Yep.”

“Yeah, well you’re not his, so tell him to keep his hands to himself too.” Her eyes drop to my mouth. “I’m not yours either.” We’ll see.

“You sure look good in my shirt for not being mine.” “Get fucked, DeLuca.” I smile as I open the door. “Would love to. You just let me know when and where, Hart.”

“You’re a good friend to her, Rio.” “Yeah.” “And to Luke.” “Mm-hmm.” “But have you told him that you’re in love with his sister?” That earns my attention. “Ma!” “What?” she asks behind a fit of laughter. “Well, it’s true.” “No, it’s not. It’s not like that between me and Hallie.”

“It was the first time I realized that you may feel the same way about me as I’ve always felt about you.” It may be her birthday, but I swear, with that single sentence, she just made all my wishes come true.

“Ariel!” Taylor supplies as she and Max join the other two on the couch. “Absolutely not, Tay.” Rio’s brows are pinched. “Spoiler alert, but she gives up her voice because she thought some random dude was hot. We’re strong independent women here. The only princess movies we’re going to watch are the ones where they realize they don’t need a man.”

I want to kiss her. God, do I want to kiss her. I’ve never wanted anything more, but what if I’m bad at it? What if I fuck up and hit her teeth or something? What if I ruin her first kiss? She’d never be able to get a do-over. While I’m reeling and nervous and entirely in my head, Hallie leans forward and presses her lips to mine.

“Why do I need to pick a song?” she asks. It starts playing through the boombox speakers and I can’t help but laugh at the lack of subtlety in her song choice. “Because I’m going to kiss you and when we listen to next year’s playlist, I want this song to be on there so we can rewind it back however many times we want to and remember this.”

“You single, Hal?” I finally give him the long-awaited answer, nodding to tell him yes. “Good.” He takes a slow predatorial step towards me, tone sharp and leaving no room for question. “Because we aren’t fucking friends.”

With that declaration, he grips the side of my neck and slams his mouth onto mine.

“I’m not sixteen anymore, Rio. Just because we kissed doesn’t make me yours.” I lift a brow. “Is that a challenge?” “You can take that however you’d like.”

“Most of what got me through the past six years was the belief that you were terrible, and I was better off without you. It’s been quite terrifying to realize…well, to remember, that you aren’t terrible at all.”

“But I’m not your person.” My throat burns while saying it, and the words taste like a lie as soon as they’re out of my mouth. “Yeah,” he chuckles without humor. “That’s what I spent the past six years trying to convince myself of too. But I’m tired of lying, Hallie. Aren’t you?” “I don’t want to want you.” “Yeah, baby.” He nudges his nose against mine. “That makes two of us.”

“I missed you,” I admit in a breathy whisper, close to his ear. He drops his head to my chest, pausing his movements before he cups my face and leans up to kiss me again. Slowly. Deeply. Desperately. “Say it again,” he pleads. My lips turn up in a smile against his. “I missed you.”

“Goodnight, Rio.” I lean forward and kiss his lips one last time before I turn over, finding my way back to my side. All too soon, there’s a heavy arm wrapping around my waist, hauling me towards him until my back hits his chest. “Are you out of your mind? Just because I need you to be mine before I fuck you doesn’t mean I don’t want to cuddle.”

“I understand why you’re hesitant or uninterested,” he whispers. “I’m not going to push you to want me. But I am going to be here, waiting, if you ever decide you want to try again. I’m not going anywhere this time.”

I swallow hard. “I thought sex was off the table?” “It is. I’m not fucking you. I’m just fucking my fist thinking of you.” Jesus.

My bottom lip slips between my teeth at the memory. “Holy shit,” he pants. “Biting your lip like that. You’re thinking of it too.” I quickly nod. “I can tell you’re close to coming. I remember exactly what you used to look like when you were close.” “I’m so fucking close, baby. Please keep talking. Please keep looking at me.”

“I love that dress on you, baby.” “Thank you. It’s⁠—” “Take it off.” My lips part of their own accord because, wow, I like this version of him.

Hallie, you’re in here.” I tap my chest. “Regardless of the years we spent apart, you’re still in here.” She’s trying to hold back her smile, which seems like a good sign. “Are you sure that’s not just a first-love thing?” “No, baby. It’s a last-love thing.”

“Because it’s always been us.” With his knuckle, he tilts my chin up so I look at him. “Even when I thought I didn’t want it to be, I knew it was us. I sat there getting this permanently inked onto my skin, trying to convince myself I was only getting it as a reminder that love existed when the whole fucking time, I knew it only existed with you.”

“But in case it needs to be said out loud… Yes, Hallie Hart, you are my girlfriend. Though, you should know, there’s a good chance I’ll be changing both that title and that last name one day.”

“I told your mom that I love you.” I can’t help the smile that slowly slides across my lips, or the way the skin around my eyes creases at the corners. Fuck, that feels good to hear.

It should be said as much as possible. Because I love you, Rio. I have loved you since we were children, and I will love you until we’re old and gray. But if you didn’t already know that, then I’ve been doing something wrong.” My smile only expands. “I know you love me, baby, and you know I love you. I haven’t stopped loving you.”

“I love you, Hallie Hart. Spoken or unspoken, I’ve always loved you.”

“Hallie, do you remember the very first day we met, and you were listening to music? You had to finish the song before you could talk to me.” She smiles to herself. “Of course.” “Do you remember why you said you kept track of those songs?” “Something about when I want to relive a moment, I can rewind it back and start from the beginning.” “Exactly. I want to rewind all of it, Hallie. I want to remember everything. You made sure we could remember our first years together, so I made sure we would remember this one.”

“Are they all moments we shared?” “Actually.” I hover my thumb over the last song on the list. “You weren’t there for this one.” Pressing play, I let the music come through the earbuds. I let her listen for a while. I let her be the one to ask. She looks up at me. “What happened while you were listening to this song?” I smile at her softly. “This is the song I was listening to when I signed my contract extension with the Chicago Raptors.”

“Rio, playing for Boston is your childhood dream.” I shake my head. “You’re my childhood dream.”

“Rio,” Indy calls from across the firepit, sitting on her husband’s lap. “Ryan has something he wants to tell you.” We all shift our attention his way. “Uh…” he stumbles, and Indy gives him an encouraging nod. “I just wanted you to know that…” He clears his throat. “I love you, man.”

“I don’t know, Ryan.” I toss my head from side to side, studying him from across the firepit. “It just didn’t hit the way I always imagined it would.” “Oh, get fucked!”

“Ryan, I love you too, man. Less than her, but I still love you. I love all of you.” I look around at the entire group. “Friends are the family you choose, and I’ve got to say, I’ve got the best family a guy could ask for.”