Rewind It Back (Windy City, #5)

by Liz Tomforde

Here’s to the 10 characters, 5 couples, 3 teams, 2 sets of siblings, and 1 amazing friend group that changed my life. This one is dedicated to you, the readers. Thank you for hanging out in Chicago with me.

“Are you excited to go home?” That question gives me pause, because for a moment, my first thought is that I am home. But then I realize she doesn’t mean this version of home, with her in my house.

Leaving her in the kitchen, I head for the stairs and I’m halfway up when I pause. Because there’s music playing throughout my whole house. Music that Hallie put on.

I want to see him. I want to watch him work his fist over himself. I want a front-row view to witness this man come undone.

And moaning. God, the moaning alone is a soundtrack I could come to. He sounds so desperate, so turned on,

“Hallie.” His voice is muffled from the water still, but it’s projected for me to hear. “If you’re going to stand out there and listen, you may as well come in and watch. It’s nothing you haven’t seen before.”

I take another step. “How often do you say my name while getting yourself off?” “A disturbing amount.”

“Are you still thinking about me?” “I’m always thinking about you, Hallie.” An unpermitted whimper escapes my throat at that admission.

Lastly, I look to Indy, who is fucking crying…again. “Ind, really?” “I’m not crying! I’m fine. I’m just really happy that you’re happy.” She cleans up under her eyes. “You deserve to be happy, Rio. You both do.”

“And honestly, Hallie, I don’t want to start over with you. I want to accept that we went through some shit, you more than me. We hurt each other, and I made mistakes.”

“And those mistakes changed us in certain ways, but in others, we’ve remained the exact same. It wouldn’t be our story if we ignored all the bad parts, so I’m not going to. I’m not going to run away because where could I go? Hallie, you’re in here.” I tap my chest. “Regardless of the years we spent apart, you’re still in here.” She’s trying to hold back her smile, which seems like a good sign. “Are you sure that’s not just a first-love thing?” “No, baby. It’s a last-love thing.”

“The other night when I said I hoped that one day you’d let me fall in love with you again, what I meant to say was that I hope to earn the chance to fall in love with you again. And that’s not going to happen if I’m too busy regretting the past. So, yes. I made the biggest mistake of my life, and it’s probably going to take some time to fully forgive myself for it, but I don’t want to waste that time without you.” With both hands, I cup her jaw, sliding my fingers into her hair. “It’s always been you, Hallie, and I think we both know it.” She’s just standing there, smirking up at me. “So, yeah…” I stumble. “That’s my big speech.” “Are you done?” “I’m done.” “Then you should probably kiss me now. We already lost six years. I don’t feel like wasting any more time.”

tuck her hair behind her ear. “What do you say, Hal?” She nods. “I think you should take me to your house.” I can’t hold back my smile. “Did I ever tell you how much I love the convenience of us being neighbors?”

“Rio.” Her eyes bounce between mine. “You should know. It’s always been you too.”

There are a few tattoos, and I’d call all of them new because they’re new to me, but I couldn’t tell you what the others are. My attention is fixated on only one. “Hallie,” Rio says tentatively. “Say something.” I can’t. I’m speechless. Because how am I supposed to speak when my eyes are glued to what is essentially my last name, tattooed as a heart, inked over his actual heart?

“Because it’s always been us.” With his knuckle, he tilts my chin up so I look at him. “Even when I thought I didn’t want it to be, I knew it was us. I sat there getting this permanently inked onto my skin, trying to convince myself I was only getting it as a reminder that love existed when the whole fucking time, I knew it only existed with you.”

“Six years.” My eyes shoot to his. “I’ve only ever been with you.”

It might be the most beautiful I’ve ever seen her. Untethered. Undone. Mine. And the realization that I may have gotten so lucky that, for the second time in my life, she may actually be mine, has me coming with her. I spill into her while chanting her name like a fucking prayer against her lips. Which is fitting, because she feels like my answered prayer. And as we come down together, I make sure to tell her that.

“Do you remember why you said you kept track of those songs?” “Something about when I want to relive a moment, I can rewind it back and start from the beginning.” “Exactly. I want to rewind all of it, Hallie. I want to remember everything. You made sure we could remember our first years together, so I made sure we would remember this one.”

“Our home.” Sliding my palms up her thighs, I pull her tighter against me. “I thought you would’ve realized it the first time you came over. Hallie, the irony of hiring you to design the house is that you’re the person I bought it for.” Those eyes start to gloss over again, and she shakes her head. “I thought there was no way, at first. I noticed the white walls and the four bedrooms. The proximity to the city while still being in a neighborhood, but I thought there was no way you would have remembered that.” “I remember everything about us.” “When I learned you still had the mixtapes and I saw the tattoo, I thought maybe it could be.” “The house has always been yours, Hallie. Ours. It was just waiting for you to come make it a home.”

I truly could not love this woman more than I already do. But I thought that yesterday and the day before. Shit, I thought that a decade ago, and daily, I’m proven wrong. Because each new day, I fall for her a little more.

“But the house. It’s a lot of upkeep and I worry about that as you get older.” “Excuse me?” “I mean, as you stay the exact same age of twenty-nine, just as you have been for my entire life.” “Thank you.” A smile cracks on her lips

Hallie is talking about when I see the way Mikey looks over at her, watching her speak to someone. He watches her like she sets the sun. He watches her like I watch this girl in my lap.

I’ve constantly felt like the third wheel catching a private moment I wasn’t supposed to be a part of, but at the same time, it was something I longed for in my own life. I’ve always wanted what my friends had. I always wanted what I once had.

The five of them migrate our way, and though they could not be more different from one another, they get along so well. Hallie slides onto my lap, while the others find their way to their person. Then it’s the ten of us. How it was always supposed to be.

“Uh…” he stumbles, and Indy gives him an encouraging nod. “I just wanted you to know that…” He clears his throat. “I love you, man.” My eyes go comically wide while everyone else stays perfectly silent. I’ve been waiting to hear him say that for years. “I don’t know, Ryan.” I toss my head from side to side, studying him from across the firepit. “It just didn’t hit the way I always imagined it would.” “Oh, get fucked!”

“Yeah, well…” Ryan huffs. “I used to be the love of his life.” Hallie smiles at him. “Sorry about that, Ryan.” “Who would’ve thought?” Indy asks. “Rio found someone he loves more than my husband.”

I just sit back and watch nine of the most important people in my life. I’m the luckiest man alive, I swear.

I spent years complaining about being the single one of the group, the odd man out. But even though I was the last one, how lucky am I that I got a front-row seat to watch each of my best friends fall in love? I watched Zanders strip the façade he wore for so long to allow the flight attendant on his team’s plane to see the real him. I watched Stevie learn to love herself the way the arrogant hockey player who followed her everywhere loves her. The way we all do. I watched Indy come out of a relationship she wasn’t meant for and learn to be loved in a new, quieter way. I watched Ryan allow someone into his home and his heart after shutting everyone else out for so long, only for the brightest ray of sunshine to move in and light every dark space she could touch. I watched Kai learn to ask for help, only for that help to come in the form of a firecracker pastry chef who taught him how to have fun again. I watched Miller stop running and grow deeper roots than she ever thought she could by falling in love with a single dad and his little boy. I watched Kennedy learn how to love and be loved thanks to her husband who refused to go a day without showering her with it. I watched Isaiah persist in showing his wife exactly who he was behind the smile, all while keeping his heart open for the only woman he wanted to have it. I watched Hallie, with so much goddamn pride, as her heart softened again. She forgave me while also continuing to stand up for herself along the way. A...