More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
She’s fucking stunning. Something about her like this hits me right in the solar plexus.
“No shots. Just the truth.” “You want the truth? Truth is I remember everything, princess.”
For half her fucking life, I was the person she called when something went wrong or right. I was who she wanted. And fuck if I didn’t love being that guy.
“Because ballbuster or not, you’re still a shit liar,” I challenge. She licks her lips and leans in a breath closer. “That’s okay because it turned out you were a good enough liar for both of us.”
ohhhh goddd
“Why are you here, Killian?” I run my thumb along her cheek, and for a minute, it’s gone. The anger. The hurt. The stupid teenage hormones. It’s just Lilah and me. “Guess I wanted to see for myself that you were okay.”
“One day, you’re going to have to listen to me, princess.” “One day, maybe you’ll say something worth listening to, champ.”
Blast the music until you can’t feel a fucking thing . . .
I throw an elbow back into Killian’s stomach the way he taught me when we were ten, and I think my elbow may have just hit a brick wall. One that humors me with an oof, even though there’s no way I did any damage.
Smiling at everyone inside. Everyone but me. Me, she glares at. Full-on fucking glares.
And the girl barely breaks a sweat. It’s more like a glow. A fucking glow.
Then I think about everything Noah just laid out and realize it never did die. She might drive me batshit fucking crazy, but Lilah Ryan will always matter to me. Her safety. Her happiness. Her smile. I’d still rain down war for her.
Music can transform you. It can calm you and excite you and heal you and break you all in one really good song.
We were everything until we were nothing at all.
Killian cracks the lid open on the water, and here I go watching that stupid Adam’s apple working again. When did this turn into my kink? Oh yeah. When it’s him. He’s always been my kink, and fucking hell, that frustrates me.
“We’ve got to talk, princess.” His words and voice hold no room for argument. He’s serious, not playing, and I’m not ready for this. Not even a decade later. “No, we don’t.” I slap my hand against his chest, but he doesn’t budge.
I will not cry over this man. Not again. Not ever again. “Wrong answer, Lilah.”
“Fuck you, Killian. You didn’t care then, and you don’t get to care now.” “I never stopped caring, princess. Believe it or not.”
🛐
Night, princess.” I slide down the wall to my ass and almost silently whisper back, “’Night, champ.”
I have no doubt I just made a deal with the devil because there’s no way I’m getting out of this unscathed. Alive isn’t the same as unhurt.
“I hate that nickname.” The words don’t have the same strength they did the last time I saw her. “No, you don’t,” I say more gently than last night. “Why are you here, Lilah?”
Her eyes are so blue you’d think contacts made them that color, but they’re all her. They get darker when she cries, but she never lets anyone see that. At least she didn’t used to.
“Did you mean what you said last night?” Her voice is barely above a whisper, and it kills me to hear it like that. Hear her like that. “Every fucking word.”
to right a fucking wrong and fix it all. “You never hated me, princess, and this changes everything.”
“Because I don’t think you ever really hated me. You hated yourself. You hated what happened. And yeah, you hated my part in it. But I’m gonna bet you never hated me. And now, I’m the only one who can protect you. Karma’s a bitch, princess.”
I can handle pissed-off Lilah. Broken Lilah isn’t an option.
“Deep down, you know no one in this world will keep you as safe as I will. Some things don’t change, no matter how many years and how big a distance. And that will never change. That’s why you’re standing here.”
“Because it’s you. I’d do anything for you, Lilah.” Always would. Some things you know deep in your soul won’t ever change.
I saw somewhere that butterflies rest when it rains because it damages their wings. It was supposed to remind you it’s okay to rest during the storms in life because you’ll fly again when it’s over.
...
“Damn, Tink. That man looks so fucking hot when he’s sparring. And he’s so much bigger than you. Like holy size kink, batman. I’d let him do anything he wanted to me. The more depraved, the better.”
same.
can manage. The question is can you? But then again, you’re the better liar of the two of us.” “Fuck, Lilah. I’ll do this for you, but you’ve got to give it a break. We both fucked up back then. We were kids. We’re not the same people.” Any man who tries to say words can’t hurt never had Lilah Ryan tell him she hates him. It fucking sucks.
And now I’m smiling, and if she knew why, she’d kick my ass. It would serve me right too.
Expecting me to be the bigger person when I’m 5’2” is where you made your first mistake. I’m tiny. That just means I learned early on how to kick when I fight back.
It’s more like face-to-chest . . . And holy fucking ab muscles. Did they get bigger since I saw him in the cage yesterday? I mean . . . there’s eight of them.
Shouldn’t. Not don’t. Stupid, stupid man and his stupidly godlike body.
“Keep dreaming, St. James.” Why the hell is it so hot in here?
Killian slides his hands up my ribs and under my arms and lifts me from the couch and plants my feet on the floor like I’m a rag doll he can move at will.
hot.
Jesus. Can’t he at least put a shirt on if he’s going to lecture me? It would make it easier to focus on his words instead of his muscles.
“Lilah, stop.” His voice . . . that voice . . . It’s gravelly. Strong but quiet. So damn serious, it sends chills down my arms. “Please.”
“Do I need to change into red booty shorts and a tight white tank to get your attention or are my tits just not quite big enough for you?”
“Kid, you’re so fucking screwed, you don’t even know it yet.” I release my hold and drop back on the mat. “Yeah, I actually do, thanks.”
Lilah isn’t even fifteen feet away from me, walking on the damn StairMaster again. Like her ass isn’t already enough to bring a man to his knees. Worse, that thought makes me want to kill any motherfucker who looks her way.
Her wide eyes settle, and her head lifts just a bit. It’s a mix between a brave face and relief, and that, right there, is why I agreed to all the bullshit that’s no doubt coming my way. Because that girl is the same girl who used to feel safe when she was with me just because it was me. That girl is still in there, and that means I’ve still got a chance to find that girl again. If she’ll let me in.
Killian Do you live to drive me insane? Lilah Maybe . . . Killian You do a really good job of it.
Infuriating. Completely. Totally. Utterly infuriating. He knows if he asks nicely, it’s harder for me to say no.
Today was fucking grueling. The kind of day you think might never end. But when I walk into her house and hear her laughing, I might just breathe a little easier. She doesn’t do that as much as she used to. Laughter . . . I never knew it was something you could take for granted.
“No, you don’t,” I whisper back and grab her favorite blanket from the back of the couch and wrap it around her.
lean down and kiss her forehead. “Sleep, princess. No one will ever hurt you again. Not even me.” The words are a whispered promise.
“Birthday girl . . . you in here?” I don’t step inside her space. Not uninvited. Yeah . . . nice is getting old.
“Hey, St. James.” She snaps her fingers, then points from me to her eyes. “My eyes are up here.” “Fucking princess,” I growl.
“I hate that nickname,” she murmurs but smiles the tiniest bit. “No, you don’t,” I tell her and step into her space, holding the pink gift box out for her. “Happy birthday, Lilah.”
