More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
Cole also stiffens, and then realization flashes in his gaze. “We, uhhh, we both got snipped while you were gone.” Oh shit. She’s worried about getting pregnant. Jo looks between us as if trying to determine if Cole is lying. Despite myself, something odd twinges in my heart. We wouldn’t lie to her about that.
Emotions overwhelm me, and I swallow roughly. Fucking hell. I haven’t felt things in so long. Now, for the past few months, I’ve been feeling everything I thought I locked away for so long. I can’t sleep. Can’t think. All of the feelings are rattling inside my brain so loudly that it’s all I can do to keep them silent. Jo did that to me. She made me feel again, and I fucking hate it.
I chuckle. “I’m. Going. To. Feed. You.” I open the box of nuggets. “Now be a good girl and open up.” Jo leans back further, a flush on her cheeks. “That’s stupid, I can feed myself.” “I know you can, you stubborn woman.” I arch an eyebrow. “Let me do this.”
I want her to trust me.
Ok so let her choose?
She won’t submit to me willingly. Right now. But I’m a patient man. I’ll break her down.
“im a patient man.” 5 seconds later: “ill break her down.”
“No,” he winces, a look of vulnerability flashing over his face. “Let me hold you.” I glance at Cole. “Are you hurt?” I check him up and down for injuries. “No,” his face flushes. I frown. “Why’d you wince?” “Fuck off.” Cole glares at me. I frown again. Is he upset she’s fighting him? Join the fucking club.
Not them wondering why shes fighting back when theyve done nothing but take her ability to choose away ._.
I walk around the car to grab my phone so I can take a picture of Jo. As I do, I catch a glimpse of my reflection in the mirror, and for a second, I see Pat’s face.
I shove away from him. My dream is fresh in my mind, and everything feels so real and overwhelming. My mom’s dismissal of me, their dismissal of me, it all feels like one giant wave that’s going to crash over me and drown me in its emotions. Cole’s jaw clenches again. I want the emotions to stop. I turn to the window. “Why don’t you just fucking kill me? Just kill me like you did Sage, and don’t drag it out.”
Baby :(
“Believe me or not, Jo, but I want to make you happy.”
Cole leans over me, his voice cracked, eyes still wild. “I wanted that baby, Jo. I didn’t care if it was Jayden’s or mine; it was ours, and I wanted it. I’ve spent the last six months missing someone I never knew.”
commit. Cole circles Pat, eyeing him up and down. I’ve tried to keep the injuries insignificant. He has no more fingernails or toenails. I ate a few in front of him before he passed out.
ATE WHAT-
“Pat got me too, Jay. I had a shitty mom. That’s my burden to bear. I’m sorry, but stop trying to fix me.”
“Hey.” Cole raises a hand to brush the hair out of my face, letting warm drops drip down my skin. “I won’t let anything bad happen to you.”
Cole drops his head to mine, blue, pained eyes boring into mine. “Please.” Then he says softer, so soft I almost don’t hear it over the spray of the water, “Make it better.”
this is so sad pls
“Jo, I’m so fucking hungry right now; if you don’t tell me every single meal you cooked, I’m going to smack that ass red, then eat you until I’m full.”
LMAO WELL DAMN
“Was delicious. I need you to make it again.” “I can do better.” Cole groans. “Don’t tease me. As soon as we get settled, and I mean the minute, you’re making me something.” I roll my eyes but feel a grin creeping at my mouth. “What’s your favorite food?” Cole grins, “You.”
WAIT OK THIS IS SO CUTE
“Oh, hey.” Cole glances over at me. “That was a joke. Tell me about your favorite meal.” I pick at the sheet under us. “I don’t know.” “C’mon, fucking tell me.” Cole puts one of his hands over mine. It’s silent for a bit until I glance up into his eyes. I see nothing but interest.
Awwww
“Mac ‘n cheese?”
This is the most normal conversation they've had in this whole duet
Cole is silent, and I look at him. He’s looking at me, his eyes soft. Then, he says something that makes me freeze. “I see why everyone fell in love with you.”
COLE HAS MY HEART
“Just fixing your hair, lemon drop,” he says softly, brushing my hair aside. “I can see why everyone fell in love with you online. You’re beautiful when you talk about the things that you love.”
I swallow again, asking softly, “Why’d you come after me?” Cole’s throat bobs slowly. “Because I wanted you, Mary Jo Hall. Always have.”
A bit of pain graces Cole’s face, and he asks, “Why’d you hide?” I stare at the dark ceiling, listening to Jayden’s breathing. “Because I was scared.” “Of what?” My stomach clenches, and the silence drags on. Then softly, so softly, I whisper, “This.”
“It’s not you,” I say quickly. “Well, I don’t know. I guess…” I glance down. “I don’t know how to say it.” “Try,” he whispers. I pull in a breath. I can’t say it. That I’m afraid this isn’t real. That I’m just a game he’ll get bored of as soon as he wins. “I’m afraid.” It’s all I can get out. Cole softly grabs my hand. “I will never hurt you, Jo. Not where it counts.” He reaches out and taps my chest. “Not here.” I stare at the sheets. “Look at me,” Cole demands, his tone harsh. I glance up. Cole’s eyes soften. “I promise I’ll never get tired of you. And if I do, you can stab me with that
...more
“Because I see you, Jo. When I look into your eyes, I see you. I see a girl with fire and spunk. One who’s had to fight for every scrap of love she’s ever been given. One who’s still funny and sassy despite all that. And when I look at you, I see a little bit of me.”
“I’ll chase you to the ends of the earth, Jo. Please stop hiding from me.” Then, even softer, “I need you.”
OKAY IM SOLD. I LOVE COLE BAD
Jo takes it from me with a small smile. I watch her attentively as she takes a bite. There’s a weird moment where I actually feel…afraid. Which is weird. I never feel afraid. But I want her to like it.
AW
I swipe the fork from Jo and take a bite. As soon as I do, I nearly choke. I spit my bite out on the plate. The eggs taste bitter and herbal. They’re absolutely nasty. Jo’s trying to choke back a laugh, her face growing red. “What the fuck?” I cough. “Special ingredient?” “Fuck off,” I snatch the plate away, slightly hurt and embarrassed. “Hey, I liked it.” Jo puts her hand on my arm. I pull away from her, cheeks burning. “No, I mean it.” Jo scoots forward on the bed and grabs my jaw, pulling my face toward her. “You made it for me. That means everything.”
MY HEART PLS
Trying to make her happy again. I need her to be happy again. Jo’s happiness is like crack, and I need it more than I need my next breath.
Fucking hell, I’m crazy about this fucking woman.
“Could it be ‘cause you’re a dick?” Jo looks up at me with innocent eyes. I laugh and slam a pillow into her. She’s such a fucking brat. And I love her for it. I’m not a dick. Well, maybe I am. But my brat loves it, and therefore, I won’t be changing, ever.
I LOVE THESE TWO PLS
“Knees,” Jayden demands, then jerks me to the ground. “Or did you forget your place, slut?”
ur pissing me off
No one talks to me like that, and I see red. “You’ll clearly fuck me anywhere and in front of anyone just to prove a point. Well, guess what? You’re a selfish asshole who only cares about himself.”
PERIOD
I’ll never be seen here. All I’m wanted for is something to break, and I’ve been weak to think there could be something else.
:(
I was stupid. This will never work. I was being stupid. Unwanted feelings overwhelm me. I’ve never been wanted. Not by my parents, not by Kyle, and clearly not by them.
Babygirlllll :(
“You haven’t seen fucking anger yet.” “Please,” I scoff. “That’s the only thing I’ve seen.” Jayden is silent. I shake my head. “Are you going to kill me?” “What?” Jayden leans into the glass. “Are you going to kill me?” I ask slowly. “Never,” he swears softly. I just shake my head. “You don’t believe me.” I laugh, but it’s not humorous. “You’d rather kill than feel. Of course I don’t believe you.”
“No.” Cole shakes his head. “Make her heart feel safe, Jayden.”
EXACTLY
Suddenly, Cole wraps me in a hug. He squeezes, holding me tightly. “I love you, Jay. And I’m sorry.”
“She posted a picture of you guys after, at some pond. Had a nasty shiner. Girl got you good.” Cole laughs. I think back. I remember that day. We went to a summer party together. That black eye wasn’t from the fight, though. I shake my head. “Nah, that girl couldn’t land a punch even if she tried.” The car gets silent. “She didn’t give that to you?” I laugh. “No, that was my dad.” Heavy silence. Immediately, I freeze. The energy in the car shifts. Oh shit, I shouldn’t have said that.
I’ve been trying to break something that was already broken. Something just like me.
I want Jo to actually want me. No gimmicks, no force, no overpowering. I want her to want me for me.
Then, there’s a rustle of the sheets, and Jo climbs in behind me. A rush of relief fills me, and it’s so overwhelming that I want to cry. I turn to grab her and curl my body around her. Burying my nose in her hair, tears sting my eyes.
AWWWWW
“I tried to remember what you told me, but you didn’t say what kind of cheese, so I bought them all.” I look through the ingredients. “You didn’t get any spices.” I feel Cole shrug. “So we’ll get some.” The fatigue hits me again. “I don’t feel like going out.” “Well, lucky for you, the store is right under us.” “What?” I turn to look at Cole, and he lets me. His eyes twinkle. “Isn’t that what you wanted? A grocery store close? I’m sorry it’s not open 24/7, but we’re not rich enough for that yet. Soon, though. Very soon.” I just blink. He fucking remembered that?
“You may be embarrassed, but I have no issues showing off my woman for the world to see.”
He grins. “I’m here for the long run.” I stare at him. I don’t know how to process that information. Despite myself, there’s a flicker of hope. “And.” Cole has stopped moving altogether. “I know you push me away because you’re scared, but I have…You’re the first woman I’ve allowed into my life since my mom.”
Jo’s smiling deeply now. “I’ve always wanted a dog.” “I know.” Cole beams proudly. Jo grins and smashes a kiss to Cole’s face.
Now, I realize how stupid it was. “It’s dumb, whatever.” “No, it’s not! I love them.” Still, I don’t look at her. “Jayden.” A hand touches mine. I jump, looking at Jo, afraid of what I’ll see. Instead of mocking pity, I see appreciation. It’s hidden under hesitancy, but it’s still there. Something warm blooms in my chest.
“I want to do both wrists. Two skeleton hands holding your wrists. One for me, one for Cole.”
“I don’t want it to cover your scars. I want it to be there for your scars.”
Jayden runs his hands aggressively through his hair. “You don’t have to hide from me anymore, Jo. I’m not perfect, but I’m going to keep working so you never have to hide again. None of us will.”
“We’ll never get bored of you, Jo.” Cole leans in. “We’re only beginning to crack the surface of Mary Jo Hall, and we’re already obsessed. There’s nothing that you can say or do that would make us less interested. You’ve tried. Didn’t work.” Cole chuckles. “Stop,” I whisper, emotion clogging my throat. “That word didn’t work before, and it won’t work now.” Cole plants a kiss on my head. “Even if you beg.”
