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She longed to do something unhinged and beautiful.
This girl is a relentless force of chaos. Everything that can get under his skin and threaten his planned and orderly world.
Ugh. Having the same emotions as Nathaniel Whitford is nauseating.
What is it about her? Her weird. Her quirk. Her brazenness to just be. Her IDGAF attitude and ballsy demeanor antagonize and intrigue him all at the same time. She’s a fucking Rubik’s Cube. No, strike that. She’s more of the puzzle box from Hellraiser.
It’s a strange sensation. A man listening. Looking at her in a way that makes her think she could tell him anything and he’d accept it.
She’s like an eclipse. Dark and light. Terrifying and fascinating. A once-in-a-lifetime event to remember before it’s gone.
He’s literally the worst person I’ve ever met. But he is taller than me. So there’s that.”
she’s gone from the woman he wanted to scrape from his memory to the woman he can’t stop thinking about.
Ash should come with a disclaimer. Catlike and beautiful, with random acts of violence. And still, all he wants to do is get close. Experience her light.
He laughs, and it feels like her favorite sweater wrapped around her hips. Comfortable. Livable. Home.
The word like is far too simple for Ash Keller. He’s completely gone for this woman. Questioning it, controlling it, seems impossible.
“I’m sure you have better things to do than watch me sleep.” He sweeps his thumb over her bottom lip. “On the contrary. I’m pretty sure it’s my ideal hobby.”
He’s softer with her. All his barbs and taunts and evil eyes now come coated in a sheen of affection.
she feels like the home he’s never had.
“Your weirdo dreams are my absolute favorite. And you are my absolute favorite weirdo.”
It was inevitable. Falling in love with Ash.
She never thought she’d want to try again. And maybe she doesn’t. Maybe she just wants it with Nathaniel. Maybe he is that little invisible string, that universal gotcha, that man she never saw coming.
God, just the man’s hand is an entire love language.
She’s allowed to have happiness, and it looks like Nathaniel. In every universe, it will look like him.
The power she has over him, it’s deafening. All he can hear, all he knows: this girl has made his life better. Every day he’s alive will be better because of her.
Ash is the kind of woman who makes a man feel like he’s fucked up for taking so long to discover her.
“I’ll love you enough for the both of us.”
“I’ll miss you.” “It will be great to be missed,” he says. His smile is wide and his eyes are bright. “It will be an honor.”
“I will give it all to you, Ash, but you have to fucking let me.”
Death has taught her that having the chance to say goodbye, to find joy in the sad, truly can change a life.