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I would spend the rest of my days making her flower crowns if she wanted to be a queen. My queen. Not Kitt’s. Not Ilya’s. Mine.
And when words finally spill from her lips, she might as well have plunged a dagger into my back like she promised so long ago.
“Then I will marry you, Kitt. To save this kingdom from itself.”
But a smile has quickly been associated with pain, leaving little joy to remain in the action.
“Then we’ll make the most of it. I will be your Enforcer. Your rival. Your secret waiting beneath the willow.”
“For once, it is I who will be your undoing.” And in this moment, I would beg him to be just that. Would give anything to live out the rest of my days under this willow and in his arms.
And here I sit, unable to stop it. Unable to do anything but watch them slowly become each other’s forever.
But I will only survive this life if she does.
“I’m selfish, Paedyn. I burned your home to the ground just to have you and now it is all of Ilya standing in my way, tempting me to light a match.”
“Damn fate, and duty, and every other word meant to keep us apart.” Tears slip from those blue eyes I would happily drown in. “I want to hide with you beneath the willow tree. You are the secret I will spend the rest of my life keeping.” Her voice quivers beneath the weight of such a promise. “Us.”
Every beast can be defeated. A creature. A Trial. A king.
“It’s as though you were born for this.”
I sit there, stunned and still and staring at the very meaning of devotion. I’ve never witnessed beauty look so content in its brokenness.
“Where’s your sword? I need to hit something.” A ray of sunshine, this one.
As though I’m staring at the angel of death.
So this is it. In the end, an Azer will always choose duty. And my death has just become that.
Fight back, Pae. I need you to fight back.
I shut my eyes again, letting him carry me into my demise. Hoping Adena and my father will be there on the other side of this blade.
“You’re the Enforcer,” I manage weakly. “An Ordinary was never going to win this.” He shakes his head at me. “But you are not quite ordinary, are you?”
“Come on, Paedyn,” he murmurs. “Don’t give up yet.”
Regret washes over me for every moment spent pretending I hated them—every moment spent pretending I hated him.
That is what I was in the end. His ruin.
I am grief. I am sorrow. I am anguish alike.
I watch what is left of Kai drip into the water. And for the first time in weeks, I’m not repulsed by blood—in fact, I wish to cling to his.
“Paedyn, I love you. Like nothing else before, I love you. And I’ve been waiting to tell you since I realized your eyes are my favorite color and your freckles the only constellation worth looking at. I could lie—say that you’ve stolen my every thought and heartbeat like the thief you are, but all of me was already yours. Pae, you are my inevitable.”
You know how good the staff is at keeping secrets. They’ve been doing it for decades.”
“Don’t deprive me of seeing your face one last time.” I falter. “It wouldn’t be the last time.” “It wouldn’t be the same,” he answers quickly.
“Don’t,” Kai practically chokes. “Don’t walk toward me wearing that dress.” I’ve never heard the Enforcer sound so shaken. “It only reminds me that I won’t be the one awaiting you at the end of that aisle.”
“Where are you going?” His palms rise as if accepting defeat. “Somewhere you cannot torture me, Gray.”
“Are you completely unaware of how devastating you are?” Kai chuckles darkly. “You don’t need a blade. I would bleed if only you asked.”
I will tease her until my dying breath, spar until I’m buried six feet beneath her feet. I am forever her rival, and I revel in it.
“Don’t push it, Azer.” She smiles, and I wish for nothing more than to kiss it from her lips.
Peace is the place he resides, and passion is a word I only understand when I look into his eyes. He is the freedom I cannot grasp.
“Are you sure, Pae?” I smile up at him, having never been so sure of anything in my life. “Yes,” I answer softly. “Tonight will be our forever.”
She presses her forehead to mine, lips quivering as she whispers, “There is nothing I regret more than not having the time with you.”
“I did nothing of the sort.” She tilts her head at me. “You have always been more powerful than you believe.”
He is a poet. A fool. A man writing his final goodbye.
Grief is my equal. Misery a mirror. I call sorrow by its name and speak my own.
Nothing is stronger than a woman who is told she’s weak.
“Marry me, Pae. I’m already on one knee, but I’ll get down on both and beg for you, if you like.”
Her voice is steady. “You are mine, Malakai.”
I smile back, just as Adena taught me to. This life is sweet. Like honey.
Kitt squints up at it, finding two shimmering dots among the sheet of nothingness. They wink down at him like stars plucked from the sky above Ilya.
The deep voice rumbles above him. “We are all waiting for someone.”
