Parenting with Love and Logic: Teaching Children Responsibility

by Foster W. Cline

MOM: “Would you mind taking those words to your room? Thank you.” SON: “No! I don’t have to.” MOM: “Did I ask in a nice way?” SON: “Yeah, so what? I’m not leaving!” MOM: “Not wise, son. I am learning a lot from this.” Mom walks off and allows her son to temporarily believe he has won the battle. However, he will learn later about the foolishness of his decision. The following day he asks his mom to take him across town to his soccer game and discovers the results of being uncooperative: SON: “Mom, will you take me to my game? Mrs. Howarth can’t drive today.” MOM: “I don’t know. Did you ask in a nice way?” SON: “Sure. What’s this all about?” MOM: “Yesterday I learned from you that asking in a nice way doesn’t get the job done. Remember that little episode when I asked, in a nice way, for you to go to your room? What did you teach me at that time?” SON: “I don’t know.” MOM: “You taught me that asking in a nice way doesn’t mean all that much. I’d appreciate your giving that some thought. And some day when I feel better about your level of cooperation, I’ll be glad to help out.”