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For AK. Just in case you don’t know the impact your gentle, steadfast friendship has made on me over the last decade, this one is for you. Our friendship wasn’t founded in grief, but it was grown in it. I think that makes it immeasurably stronger.
omg so basically this was written for
me
“Just, do what you want and fuck anyone who says you can’t, okay? If you want to party, do it. But if you don’t want to, don’t.”
If I’m asking questions, then I’m trying to get help or sympathy. I’m weak. But if I’m confident in my skills, then I think I’m better than everyone else.
I like noticing details like this, the work people—especially women—put into their appearance.
omg king
“I hate being alone.” Me, too. “Great. Then I’m not leaving you alone, Ro,”
“I think you’d be really easy to love,” she says. It’s a lax, whispered compliment, one she doesn’t know sounds like a gunshot in my head, hitting me straight in the chest.
“And I score on defended nets all the time.” Freddy shrugs, then leans across the now-too-short table to peer up at me with playful eyes and a pretty smile. “The goalie makes scoring more difficult, not impossible.”
SIRRRR
“No, I’m good. We can continue your twenty questions.” “I’ve got way more than twenty, princess, but we can start there.”
“If you were my girlfriend, Rosalie,” he says, his voice deep and rough. My full name is like warm honey dripping from his lips. “You wouldn’t have to do anything to convince me. Just a fucking smile and I’d be a goner, okay?”
I make a vow then to protect her, the pretty girl with butterflies in her messy curls, even if she’ll never really be mine.
“I’ll be your friend, Ro,” I say. “I want you to see me as your friend.” “I’d like that, Matt.” She smiles, small and gentle, and I feel another layer of care and protectiveness reach out from me to her. A friend—not because of being on the same hockey team or some kind of trade-off. Just my friend, because she wants to be.
“Goddamn it, Kane, don’t make me save your ass.”
waitttt…guys r they trying to make me like kane bc like lowkey im starting to like kane
Because I respect Ro; I look up to her, like a role model. She is kind and welcoming, helpful—and there’s no ulterior motive. She’s creative and strong and independent. She’s nothing like me. She doesn’t need other people’s praise to feel like she’s worth something. Doesn’t need pretty words to drown out the echoes of the ugly ones always shouted in my dad’s voice. Ro doesn’t need anyone. But right now, she’s in my arms and I’m the one giving her comfort. I bask in it.
wait wtf why is this sad
“Go ahead, Ro. Let it out.” I shake my head against him, but he presses a surprising kiss to my hair and only holds me harder. “It’s okay. The lights are off—everyone’s sleeping or got headphones in. You’re fine, cry if you need to. I’ve got you.” I believe him.
awwww wait stop being sad
I feel lost. Floating without a tether.
It takes me an hour to drive away. I spend most of it convincing myself not to follow her inside. She doesn’t need someone like me.
STOP IM ACTUALLY GONNA CRY FREDDY WTF
He makes everything ten times better. I’ve always known he was intoxicating to be around—since the first time I met him I’ve been entranced—and it has nothing to do with his beauty. I look over at him, see his bright green eyes crinkling with a grin. Plush, too-pink lips and smile lines carved into his cheeks. No. It’s not about what he looks like at all. It’s him, just as he is, like a magnet pulling forever at my focus until all I can see is him. Tyler makes me feel small and naive, silly.
But Matt is different. His presence feels warm and vibrant. Being around him is like the climb before the drop of a roller coaster—bright anticipation filled with the safety to free-fall without getting hurt.
To be loved is to be seen—and she’s the first person to really see him. That’s why they fall in love.”
So I file the information away—that the list exists at all—into my Rosalie Shariff folder, and secretly hope that it’ll be me next time drawing checkmarks in the margins with her.
I made you a coffee—I think I got your order right.” I think I’d drink rotten milk if she made it for me.
Just like everything else when it comes to Ro, it’s so real
I shrug. “I did some digging.” I spent all night searching for something to even slightly show my appreciation for what you’ve done for me.
awww and he has troubl reading too so it must have taken him so much longer but he still did it i think i love him
setting the pastel pink bag on my shoulder and heading for the door with Ro behind me.
hes an icon for that
Actually, I’ve never seen Paloma with friends. Not any real ones, at least, and no one I could name. She’s always alone. Thankfully when I look back at her, Bennett is already there, kneeling by her side and whispering something quickly to her, at which she shakes her head and closes her eyes. His jaw clenches tight, but he doesn’t move. I relax a little knowing I don’t have to watch her so closely anymore—I trust any of my team to take care of her, but Bennett above most everyone else.
wait wtf am i supposed to be shipping this i could ship this actually i need a book on them rn
Bennett is with a girl sitting two steps down from him, her arms wrapped around his massive thigh and calf, blond hair pouring over his jean-clad knee where his hand gently combs through the strands, careful and slow. He isn’t looking at her, surveying the party as he usually might. But— Steps faltering, I do a quick double-take as we pass them and realize it’s Paloma, face serene and eyes closed as she lies in Reiner’s lap while the stoic goalie carefully guards over her. He barely flicks his eyes up to meet mine, but his face is a stone mask before he nods to Ro on my heels and gives me a
...more
ok wait so i actually love this and need it to become a thing and also i literally love freddy for that hes so funny
If you wanna kiss someone, I’m right here.” It comes out breathy, but I’m smiling as my hand works its way up her side to rest against the right side of her neck. I lean in, skimming my nose along her cheek. “And I’m way fucking better at it than him. I promise, princess.”
OMFGGGG
Hey,” he chides gently. “Let’s not use those words to describe ourselves.”
ur honor i love him...let me marry him pls
I’ve heard Matt Fredderic describe himself as a “whore” or the “school slut” more times than I can count. But Freddy is more protective of every other person in the world than he will ever be of himself.
anddd now i want to cry
If you click your heels three times, do you think you’ll end up in your dorm or Fredderic’s bed?” he says with a snarky smirk before grabbing his mask and sliding it back on, gripping his shirt in the other hand and storming out.
wait wtf just happened hello??
It would be so easy to love him, I think.
He’s kind with everyone. He’s attractive, physically, yes, but he’s truly attractive because of how he treats those around him.
im literally obessed
“I just want to hold you. Just for tonight, please.”
It’s killing me to see you cry, princess. Please.” “I’m s-sorry,” she splutters, words mangled and caught up in sobs. “Don’t apologize, love, just tell me what I can do to fix it. What’s wrong?”
no like im being so fr rn when i say that i think i would die for this man
I’m starting to think I’d give up anything, even hockey, for that life with you.
What about your prom?” I want to smirk and ask, “Which one? The one where my history teacher showed me how to eat a girl out in a closet? Or the one where my girlfriend, for whom I’d already planned a romantic night and spent every dime to my name to make it special for her, asked if I wanted to try a threesome with her best friend in the hotel?”
ermmm repite por favor
It’s okay, Rosalie,” I whisper, smoothing her hair back. “But just know—the second you ask me to kiss you again, I’m not holding back.” And though I have self-control, I’m not a saint, so I steal a kiss on her cheek, near the corner of her mouth. “All I have to do is ask?” she asks, raising her hand to where I my lips had just been. I nod. “All you have to do is ask.”
girl i would ask in about .2 sec its not even funny
“Freddy—” “No,” he says roughly. “Call me Matt. Please.”
i keep on forgetting his names matt not freddy
“Listen, Ro, I like you. I do. But I need team players on my team. Those willing to put their differences aside, to not be bitter about the past and be able to work with people they might not get along with.”
BITCH
Kane is behind him, standing toward the exit with his arms crossed like some strange bodyguard, somehow keeping both my father in here and the rest of the team out.
OMG MY BABYYY
“I don’t know why I called you. I’m fine. You’re busy—everyone’s busy right now with finals and no one has time for this kind of shit. Sorry, I should go.”
nooo
“Came back here after my class. I figured you’d have to show up sometime.” His class—meaning he’s been sitting here since 2 p.m.? “It’s nine o’clock at night.” “Shit, is it?”
i love him
Her brain, her kindness—that’s why I want her. But God, her body has me ready to drop to my knees and stay there, staring at her like a work of art, never getting my fill.
Her fingers tangle in the chain on my neck, pulling a little sharply. She could pull me around with it and I’d follow like a damn puppy.
Loving Rosalie Shariff would be the easiest thing I’ve ever done—I know, because I’m already doing it. I think I’ve loved her since the day she stood up for me in that conference room. As a friend first, something I’ve never had, but now it’s more. It’s overwhelming, suddenly hard to swallow or even look at her. So I turn her around and wash her back reverently. I can’t stop myself from pressing a kiss into her back, right at the top of her spine. I think loving you would be the greatest thing in my life.
He’s like a shower and cool sheets after baking in the summer sun. A nap after the beach, all at once comforting and invigorating. Healing.
But you’re in control of our direction, Ro.”
Be mine. Let me call you my girlfriend, not just my friend. I’ll be so fucking good to you.
yesss i agree with this 100 percent
And do you forgive them?” “Yeah. At least… for her. I’ll always forgive her.” He grips the steering wheel harder. “Don’t think I could hold a grudge against her if I tried.”
omggg im already obssesed with them give me their book rn
Because they’ve been disappointed by too many people,” he says. “And I won’t be one of them.” He pauses and heaves a heavy sigh. “And… she deserves it.”
i already love him so much
