The Red Scrolls of Magic (The Eldest Curses, #1)

by Cassandra Clare

Each time he finished a postcard, Alec wrote Wish you were here at the end. And each time, Magnus snatched the card and wrote, with a flourish, Except not really.

Enjoying life was essential, but sometimes it was an effort.

It was as though each of them had discovered something unexpected but infinitely desirable.

He hoped the memory would not hurt later.

Being taken care of was strange to him, but he thought perhaps he could get used to it.

He’d been hurt and learned how to recover from the pain. Many times.

Other lovers had told Magnus that he was impossible to take seriously, that he was terrifying, that he was too much, that he was not enough. Magnus might disappoint Alec. He probably would. If Alec’s feelings did not last, Magnus at least wanted this trip to be a good memory. He hoped this would be a foundation for something more, but if this was all they ever had, Magnus would make it count. The crystalline glow of the Eiffel Tower receded. People had not expected it to last, either. Yet there it stood, the blazon of the city.

Romance was a lot of work.

Magnus had been dodging death for centuries. He was not used to anyone worrying this much about his near misses.

It was possible, maybe, that Alec might be as happy as Magnus was, just to be together.

Magnus said, in a low voice, “And what’s that one?” Alec answered, “Stamina.” Magnus stared. “Are you serious?” Alec began to grin. “Yeah.” “Really, though,” Magnus said. “I want to be clear on this. You’re not just saying that to be sexy?” “No,” Alec answered, his voice husky, and swallowed. “But I’m glad if it is.”

Shadowhunters were so useful when traveling. Magnus planned to never again leave home without one.

“Call it even,” said Tessa. “You once walked in on me in an embarrassing situation with a gentleman in a mountain fortress, after all.”

Magnus wondered if he would ever get used to being surprised by Alec Lightwood. He hoped not.

The Law is hard, but it is the Law,

Alec had never found Magnus annoying at all. He wasn’t sure what to make of that. Chaos swirled and orbited around Magnus like a cloud of glitter, and Alec’s own tolerance of that chaos never ceased to astonish him.

When they kissed, Alec’s body moved naturally toward Magnus, getting as close as he could, in the instinctive way his body only otherwise moved when he was fighting. He hadn’t known that it was possible for anything to feel so right or mean so much, and now they were in Paris together, alone, and anything could happen. It was exhilarating as well as terrifying.

No mission is so dangerous it isn’t worth doing in style.”

Sometimes, love worked, past any hope of change, when no other force in this world could. Without love, the miracle never came.

Alec wanted to tell him that it was all right. Magnus was safe. Alec had everything he wanted.

“Many a mission to end a great evil has failed because of low blood sugar.”

“I’m not shy,” the boy sneered. “I just hate everyone around me and everything that is happening.”

“I’m not gay,” said Raphael. “I’m not straight. I’m not interested.” “Your sexuality is ‘not interested’?” Alec asked curiously. Raphael said, “That’s right.”

He was, though Simon would probably be surprised to hear it. Alec was very familiar with how Jace behaved when he wanted to be your friend. He didn’t act friendly, which would have been too easy. Instead he just spent a lot of time in your presence until you got used to him being there, which he was clearly now doing with regard to Simon. When Jace and Alec were little, Jace had done a lot of hostile hanging around him, hoping to be noticed and loved. Alec honestly preferred it to awkward getting-to-know-you conversations.

Seeing him was always a small shock, his

face a glimpse of hope that everything might be all right.

Alec had never given much thought to dancing before, aside from a few awkward childhood attempts with his sister or their friend Aline. Magnus slid his arm around Alec’s waist and began to dance. Alec was no dancer, but he was a fighter, and he found he intuitively understood how to respond to Magnus’s movements and how to move with them. They were suddenly synchronized, gliding across the floor as gracefully as any other couple in the room, and all at once Alec knew how it was to really dance with someone—a thing Alec had never even known to want. He’d always assumed that storybook moments like these were meant for Jace, Isabelle, anyone but him. Yet here he was.

Maybe his life could be amazing. Maybe it always could have, and he’d needed Magnus to open the door and let him see all the wonders he held inside himself. All the capacity for joy.

Every feeling was new—he kept being caught off guard by the combination of the sharp, cutting ache of desire and the tenderness, incongruous and yet impossible to untangle. He had never expected anything like this, but now that he had it, he did not know how he would ever do without it. He hoped he never had to find out.

They were kissing wildly, as if starved for it, and Alec didn’t care about any of the people looking. He had kissed Magnus in the Accords Hall partly to show the world what he felt. In this moment, he didn’t care about the world. He cared about what he and Magnus were making between them: the heat and the friction that made him want to die, to drop to his knees and pull Magnus down with him.

“I’ve changed my mind,” Catarina announced. She put her arm around Alec’s neck and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “I like you.” “Oh,” said Alec, looking baffled. “Thanks.” “Please take care of Magnus,” Catarina added. “I try,” said Alec. Catarina gave Magnus a delighted look over Alec’s shoulder. “At last,” she murmured. “A keeper.”

That memory had stayed with him until he followed it to Magnus’s doorstep. Magnus did not think of himself that way, but he was kind. He was so kind that he could dismiss healing or helping as just another day.

I do not ever want another love.

Alec had been right about the darkness waiting in Magnus, and the pain waiting with it. All that darkness, and all that pain, and Magnus was somehow still a blazing riot of life and color, a source of joy for everyone around him. He was the reason Alec looked into a mirror now and saw a complete person who did not have to hide.

“Leon, are you making a pass?” demanded Helen Blackthorn. “Why do you always do this? Stop hitting on people, Leon!” “But life is short, and I am handsome and French,” Leon muttered.

Alec would be safe there, and Magnus could face anything, if Alec was safe.

But nobody ever did know, when the last kiss came.

“As for you, like any erring child, your insolence must be punished. Nor will you remember what you have done, or learn aught from it, for the memory of the righteous is a blessing, but the name of the wicked will rot.” The words were from the Bible; demons quoted Holy Scripture often, especially those with pretensions to royalty.

Alec, my Alexander. You came for me.

Magnus had always loved this particular shade of blue, the shade of the last instant when the evening was still full of light.

Alec thought he could be all right just standing in that doorway, watching Magnus smiling to see him, for the rest of his life.

“Stop telling me to let you go,” said Alec. “I will never listen. I want to be with you. I never wanted anything more in my life. If you fall, I want to fall with you.”

But as someone once said to me, the right man will not care. You can build a bridge over the divide and find each other. You can build something much greater than either of you could ever have built on your own.”

“No,” said Tessa. “Love changes you. Love changes the world. You cannot lose that love, no matter how long you live, I think. Trust love. Trust him.”

“What if I lost him by telling the truth?” “What if you lost him by hiding it?”

“I did have fun,” he said. “But I didn’t need any of that. They were just places. You don’t have to set any scene to convince me. I don’t need Paris, or Venice, or Rome. I just want you.”

“I don’t want you to be sorry!” said Alec. “I’m not sorry. I wanted to do it. I wanted all of it, with you. The only thing that bothered me was when you were in trouble without me. I want us to be in trouble together. I want us to be together, no matter what. That’s all I want.”