Sawyer (Lucky River Ranch, #3)

by Jessica Peterson

I’m walking out of the suite when I notice a table, draped in white linen, that waits in the hallway. The smell of coffee fills my head as I take in the spread. There’s a silver coffeepot, a tiny pitcher of creamer, a Saran-wrapped bowl of cut fruit. A pair of stacked cardboard coffee cups sit beside two ceramic ones. Holy shit, did Sawyer order room service for us? “Wasn’t sure if you’d want your coffee for here or to go.” I whip around at the sound of the deliciously deep, sleepy voice behind me. Sawyer is standing in the doorway, one arm held up over his head, his elbow resting on the doorframe. His thick hair sticks up every which way.

“I … hi. Hey. Good morning, Sawyer. I’m so sorry, but I think I need to head out.” The excuse, or really the lack thereof, is pathetic, but I still tilt my head toward the empty hallway. His blue eyes darken with disappointment. “Why you runnin’, pretty girl?”

“Hey.” I hear the sheet rustle as Sawyer steps closer. “You all right, Ava? If you don’t wanna stay, it’s no problem …” I do want to stay, and that’s exactly the problem.

The conversation should end there. But because I have zero self-control around this man, I find myself calling out, “Also, thanks for not killing me!” His warm, velvety laugh fills the hall. “You’re the one killin’ me. Safe travels, yeah?”

I need a man distracting me from the beautiful little life I’m building like I need a goddamn hole in my head. Things are good right now. Life is good.

We’re just about to grab some plates when I see Sally approaching, hand in hand with Wyatt. I’m always struck by how much he reminds me of Sawyer—something about the shade of his eyes and his confident, steady stride. Then again, everything seems to remind me of Sawyer, so I’ve never read too much into it.

Well, fuck. Ava in a Stetson⁠— Just. Fuck.

You got no idea how wild you make me. I wanna pull you aside right now, ask you out before one of these other dickheads makes a move.

Because she is good at what she does. I’ve never seen her in action on a horse, granted. But judging by the ride she gave me? Girl is top of her class.

The little girl looks up at her mom and smiles. “But please, Mommy, can I play with her?” “I see some future besties,” Sally says with a smile. Ava glances at me, then Ella. “Is she⁠—” “My daughter. Yes. Ella, can you say hi to Miss Ava and June?” But Ella, being the shy little bird she is around new people, curls into Wyatt’s chest. “Ella.”

I grab Ella’s hand just before she shoves it into Mrs. Wallace’s famous Texas sheet cake. “Whoa whoa whoa. Let me cut y’all some slices, okay? Let’s just get some plates⁠—” “Here you go.” Ava holds out a pair of paper plates. I notice she’s also got plastic forks and some napkins ready. Can’t help it. I grin. “Tell me you’re a parent without telling me you’re a parent.”

“So that’s why you were so distraught about not having your Tide pen on you. When I’m with her”—Ava nods at Junie, who’s helping Ella up onto the wooden picnic bench beside her—“I always throw one in my bag.” “It makes laundry so much easier when you pretreat those stains, you know?” “Wow,” she says. I look up to see Ava staring at me. Maybe I gotta get out more with her. She feeling this energy between us too? “What?” I ask. She slowly shakes her head, a funny look on her face. “Just—that might be the sexiest thing to ever come out of a man’s mouth.”

“One of your favorites,” I say without thinking. “It is, yeah.” Her green eyes flick to meet mine. “You remembered.” “How could I forget? It came on, and then you offered to body-slam me.” She laughs. “I had some memorable lines that night, didn’t I?” Yes you did, pretty girl. I remember them all.

Without that sense of connection, there’s no way I could fall in love. And that’s ultimately what I’m after—falling so hard, so completely, that I have no choice but to make that person mine forever.

Growing up, I knew I’d never be the smartest, or the best-looking, or the funniest. But I could be the one who always showed up. The one who cared the most, and who paid the most attention. That shit’s important when it comes to family.

“Daddy.” Ella tugs on my free hand. “I don’t see Junie yet. How will she play soccer with me if she’s not here?” “She’ll be here. We have to be patient.” Ella pouts. “Waiting is hard.” “I know. But we can do hard things, right?” Ella sighs. “Maybe.” Then she takes off toward the little climbing wall that leads up to one of the smaller slides.

June and Ella reappear, begging us to help them draw unicorns with the sidewalk chalk. Ava and I pop up. Wandering-Eye Asshole notices. I fall into it too easily—the fantasy that Ava is mine and the four of us are a family. Fucked up? Yes. Supremely satisfying? Also yes.

Sawyer’s deep, rumbling laugh sends a delicious shiver up my spine. “You gotta stop followin’ me around, Ava.” I try not to stare as he stops a few feet away and tucks his hands into the pockets of his vest. Not an easy task, considering how hot he looks.

“And you.” Sawyer crouches so he’s eye level with June. “You’re going to march into that classroom, and you’re going to have the best day ever, right?” Be still my beating heart. It’s jarring—jarringly wonderful—to see June being cared for this way by a man other than her dad.

Because apparently no one on earth is immune to Sawyer’s charm, my daughter smiles and nods. “Can we sing ‘Happy Birthday’ in school?” Ms. Sherman claps her hands. “As a matter of fact, it’s Nolan’s birthday today, so we’ll definitely be singing to him. You girls ready to come inside? Get your bags from your parents.” “See?” Sawyer asks, handing his own daughter the tote bag she dropped. “You’re gonna love it here, June. Shine bright today.”

He looks at me steadily, intently, his forehead grooved. “Sometimes I think all these firsts are harder for us than they are for them. After dropping Ella off the day school started, I sat in my truck and cried until pickup. I looked so puffy that Ms. Sherman asked me if I’d had an allergic reaction to something.” I’m laughing and I’m crying, and it feels … kinda good, actually. “Really?” “You think I’d make that up?” His dimples appear when he smiles. “I’m a worrier. Always have been.”

“Y’all are cute.” “Cute?” He tilts his head, frowning. “Last I checked, you said I was ‘hot as fuck.’ ” My blood thrums with a rush of heat. Sawyer’s flirting with me.

“You are hot, Ava.” Sawyer’s eyes meet mine, his lips twitching. “Now you say that I’m hot too.” “That why you wore the backward baseball hat to drop-off? To tease us unsuspecting preschool moms with your hotness?” “So you do think I’m hot.”

“So pretty, aren’t you? Inside”—his eyes move to my lips—“and out. You wanna help me, pretty girl?” The nickname. It’s just as hot coming out of his mouth as I remember.

“Lemme kiss you.” “Yes.” I keep nodding like an idiot, struggling to breathe. “I’d like that. Very much.” He chuckles. “And here I thought I was the only one dying this whole time.” “I’ve been dead since the second you waved to me in the parking lot.” “Six feet under since you dumped your beer on me.”

“Holy shit, pretty girl, you’re wet.” I lap her up. My dick goes full salute. “Really wet.” She bites her lip, opening her eyes. They’re heavy-lidded, hazy with lust. “Told you your little wave was a turn-on.” “I didn’t know I had that kinda power. I wave to a lot of people.” “Then you’re probably the reason sex toy sales have skyrocketed in Hartsville.” That makes me grin. I

Duke pokes his head into the kitchen. He’s smiling like a Cheshire cat. “Well hey y’all. Good to see you, Ava. I heard you were here in town.”

Ava offers him a little wave. “Hey, Duke. Great to see you again. And yeah, I mean, pretty crazy, right, that we’d all end up in Hartsville together?” Duke smirks. “So crazy.” “Coffee,” I grunt. “We—preschool drop-off—it’s Ava’s daughter’s first day, and⁠—” “I was tired and a little emotional.” Ava’s eyes are on mine. They glitter with amusement. “So Sawyer gave me a⁠—” “Hug.” Oh, God, now I’m really gonna laugh. My sides hurt from holding it back.

really needed a hug, yes.” “Hugs.” Duke leans against the doorframe. He looks at the pillow on my lap, then at the hat Ava knocked onto the floor. “Right. Who doesn’t love those?”

Duke touches the brim of his hat. “Ma’am. Hope to see you around here more often.” Ava grins as she passes by him. “You were wrong about your brother, you know.” “Oh yeah?” “He is a killer.” Her eyes flick to meet mine. “Just not the kind I thought.” “Interesting. I’m all ears.” She looks at me, her gaze teasing. “Killer barista. Guy makes a mean cup of coffee. I’m still buzzing.” Duke lets out a bark of laughter. “I like you, Ava.” “See ya, Duke.”

I’m wondering if my instinct to take life so seriously is part of why I’m so run-down. I’ve always felt this need to run around with my arms outstretched, on alert in case anyone falls, in case anyone needs me. I love my people, and I want to be there for them. Show up for them. Save them, because I love them too fiercely to see them suffer. But maybe I need to let people just … do their thing, so I can do mine. As we’ve gotten older, my brothers have proven themselves to be capable adult humans.

Wyatt has a wistful look on his face. “Lovers, let them love.” “Dude.” Ryder rolls his eyes. “You really need to keep that thought to yourself.” But Cash just laughs. “Loving makes life worth living.” “All right, Riley Green. Enough with the cheesy song lyrics.” “What? It’s true.” I smile, because he’s right.

AVA BARTLETT How was your day? SAWYER RIVERS Long AVA BARTLETT As long as your was this morning?

Do I fight to stay upright? Or do I surrender? What if I’m already on my knees?

“I’m Wheeler, Mollie’s business partner and true soulmate. Don’t tell Cash.” She

“Hey.” Crooking his finger underneath my chin, he tips up my face. “You okay?”

He grins, cupping my face in the warm mitt of his hand. I tilt my head so I can lean into his touch. I even place my hand over his. Safe. This feels safe. And good. And right.

Lizzie … her home life growing up wasn’t the best. Her family’s still a mess. We decided it was best that Ella live with me. Which I love. I always wanted to be a dad. I just—yeah, wish I didn’t have to do it alone.” He sniffles. I flatten my palm over Sawyer’s heart, the sting in my eyes almost too much to bear. “Oh, honey.” “It’s fine.” He reaches up to wipe his eyes. “Ella really did change my life for the better.”

“But it’s obvious they care about you. Bet they try to help you out, too. And I bet you don’t let them, because you feel like you should be helping them.” “Goddamn it, why you gotta—you just—you’re smart, aren’t you?” I look up to see him grinning at me.

nod. “What advice do you think he’d give you?” “I don’t know.”

“He’d probably tell me to not be so hard on myself. I know he’d be sad to miss out on everything that’s happening. You know, the grandkids and the ranch and stuff. He’d tell me …” Sawyer looks up, his eyes filling. “He’d say I should enjoy the time I have more. ’Cause we never know how much we got left.” “Aw, honey.” I pull him in for a hug. Run my hand over the broad expanse of his back. “Can I enjoy it with you?” He laughs. “You’re the reason I’m enjoying anything at all right now. You and Ella and June.”

AVA BARTLETT Thinking we’ll come in a few hours so I can get some stuff done here?

SAWYER RIVERS No rush Fuck that, I wanna see you. Get your ass here ASAP Oh and Ella won’t stop asking when Junie is coming over AVA BARTLETT Ha no pressure SAWYER RIVERS Pretty girl don’t you make me wait AVA BARTLETT I’ll do as I damn well please SAWYER RIVERS Of course you will. Unless I got you on your back. Then you do as I please AVA BARTLETT Gladly, cowboy

I eye my brother as he hands Ella over to his fiancée. “We’re having a chat?” “Yeah, we’re having a chat. You’re in love. As your⁠—” “Wait, wait. I’m gonna stop you right there. I’m not⁠—” “But you are.” Wyatt’s expression softens. “I know that look, because I had it too.” “Still do!” Sally calls over her shoulder.

“I get why she’s not interested in being tied down again,” I say. Wyatt leans in. “But you don’t wanna tie her down. You wanna treat her the way she deserves to be treated, right?” “Of course I do. I’d cut off my hands before I ever intentionally hurt that woman. But she knows what she wants, and it ain’t a man like me.”

“Smells good in here.” She kisses my cheek, and my blood pulses. “Don’t tell me you made that soup from scratch.” “Had to counterbalance the fake cheese somehow.” “Sawyer.” I tighten my grip on her waist. “Yeah, pretty girl?” “I missed you.” It’s a whisper. The intimacy of that admission, the sincerity in her voice—it splits me in half. I kiss her neck. “I missed you too.”

How are the girls?” “The girls are doing great. We stole your bubbles and have been playing with that big wand thing you got all afternoon. We broke for a snack, and now we’re coloring at the kitchen table.” “Ella’s been okay?” “She asked when you were going to come over a little while ago. But other than that, she’s been happy as a clam.”

“You sure?” I smile. “Can we stop asking each other that already? I’m sure, Sawyer.” I’m sure about so much more than bath time.

look at Sawyer and smile. “Ever think your best date ever would happen in a bathroom?” “What’s a date?” Junie asks. Sawyer hands her the small plastic pitcher. “It’s when two people who like each other go do something fun together.” Ella scrunches her nose. “Are you gonna kiss like Prince Eric and Ariel?” “I don’t know.” Sawyer’s head swings in my direction. “Are we going to kiss, Miss Ava?”

“I never thought my best date would be in a bathroom, no,” he replies with a grin. My heart pounds. “So this is your best date.” “I took a four-hour nap before this. Of course it’s my best date. Might be my best day.”