I Got Abducted by Aliens and Now I'm Trapped in a Rom-Com
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9%
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“We’re gonna die and I’m never going to get my PhD!”
10%
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“Right,” Toto said, walking up behind me. “You can’t just save us and not adopt us. What’s that word humans use for those animals that always stick around them? Pets? Yeah, that’s it. We’re your pets now, so you’re stuck with us. Feed me.”
17%
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“Your clan doesn’t, like, eat women, right?” “Do you honestly expect me to tell you if we did?” he asked. “You know, you could just say, ‘No, Dory, you’re perfectly safe with me.’ ” He raised his voice, mocking my higher pitch. “No, Dory, you’re perfectly safe with me.” “…Rude.”
27%
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Even then, if I wasn’t taken to help some alien race with my species-saving coochie, I’d have fucking died in that lion attack.
30%
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My knees hit the ground before I could even pretend to have an ounce of remaining feminism.
31%
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“Do you understand how badly I want to break you? I want you desperate, I want you needy, I want you so well used that you’ll never doubt who you fell from the sky for.”
60%
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“You have such an off-putting way of saying ‘thank you.’ Work on it.”
62%
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“But as a Sankado male, I need you to be safe. If you get hurt, this world and everyone in it will turn to ash beneath my hooves.” Hot.
64%
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Under no circumstances should my Black ass be creeping around an alien planet by myself. Even as I left the cave, I could feel my ancestors calling me a stupid bitch.