I Got Abducted by Aliens and Now I'm Trapped in a Rom-Com

by Kimberly Lemming

But hey, that’s how you know she’s made it. Girl’s got an entire research team plotting her assassination.

My thumb slipped of its own accord and ended the call. Terrible accident, really; could have been anyone. Funny how life works.

My knees hit the ground before I could even pretend to have an ounce of remaining feminism.

“Of course. We were being childish.” He lifted his gaze, one corner of his mouth lifting in a smirk. “I am better, though.”

Some would call ignoring your problems unhealthy. I call it an art form.

Why is the lion more romantic than the last three of my exes?

chased by what was possibly the chonkiest T. rex in existence with nothing but a bottle of puppy shampoo and a dream.

“Let’s just say the audacity of men is universal.”

life’s a bitch and then you die.

“You two are so weird. Never leave me.”