I dig around in my tote in search of my new bottle of SPF 69. Moving aside my new stick sunscreen, the spray bottle and even the zinc that I plan on using for extra coverage, I realize I may have gone a bit overboard with the suncare. In the corner of my bag I find the one I’m after. The bright pink bottle with gold lettering has a phallic design, which I imagine the marketing geniuses stuck with in order to go viral. Still, all of the testimonials I’ve seen say that it really is a miracle cream, and the ingredients match even the most exclusive brands I’ve splurged on. I shake it, squirt some
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