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“He’s looking to add his banana to that fruit salad.” I blink. “What?” “You know, batter-dipping the corn dog. Creaming your twinkie,”
“Erin’s Imperfect Guide to Seducing a Man’s Willy and the Useless Organ in His Chest.
“You can’t get any worse than what happened this morning. I walked down the street to that bookshop, DNF. The employee there, which… oh my god. Her name is Story and she sells stories, how fun is that?”
untouched honeypot.
aching meat.
Like velvet-wrapped steel.
Probably the venom that spewed from his trouser snake.
“And I’d like to munch your krabby patty.”
Imagine how you’ll blossom for me after I shave you,”
He ate your whisker biscuit?”
You’ll feel the weeds in front of your mud dungeon if it’s not pruned as well.”
“Then lemme shave your stink wrinkle first, and then I’ll have my buffet of muff pie.”
My eyes widen at the noise so similar to flatulence even though I know for a fact my buttcheeks aren’t flapping.
“Your tight, tiny canal is emptying for me. It’s my victory horn.”
“Fuck, keep that pussy tootin’. Make room for my baby gravy, love.”
