More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
Buy a man flowers, at least. Or hell, lead off with a good joke. But it is what it is, I suppose.
Because whoever is torturing this poor girl is certainly watching us right now and they can eat shit. “Lead the way, babe.”
Which is even more reason to get the hell out of here before I catch feelings. Because Conor Edwards is absolutely the guy you fall for before you learn that girls like me don’t get guys like him.
The man with more notches on his hockey stick than snowflakes in January.
“Babe, you’ve got the kind of body that boys build in their heads under the sheets after dark.”
“I mean it.” His voice thickens. “I’ve been sitting here having filthy thoughts about you all night. Don’t mistake my manners for indifference.”
“My mother didn’t raise a scoundrel, but I can be downright improper if you’re into it.”
“You’re ridiculously attractive, Taylor.” This time when he speaks, I don’t doubt his sincerity, if perhaps his sanity. I suppose someone like him doesn’t get around so much by being picky. “Don’t spend any more time believing otherwise.”
Fucking fuckturtles.
I truly believe that all body types are beautiful. It’s only when I look in the mirror that I forget.
From the first whistle, Coach has been on a rampage like he just found out Jake Connelly knocked up his daughter or something.
Whistle, skate. Whistle, shot. Whistle, kill me.
You were running on training wheels until today. Now Daddy’s dragging you to the top of the hill and giving your asses a good shove.”
I’ll say this much for these bunch of goons, we sure clean up nice.
“Gin and tonic? Bro, when did you become my grandmother?” Bucky jokes. “It’s not for me. It’s for my cougar.”
Act like a fuckboy, get treated like a fuckboy.
The world doesn’t deserve Conor Edwards.
“Everyone put your dicks away,” he announces. “We’ve got a guest.”
Men are a failed species.
“Are you our new mommy?”
“See this?” I tell the room, holding up the leather purse. “This is a sacred place. Any man who dares snoop through a woman’s purse will be murdered in his sleep by the Bag Butcher.”
“You’re cranky when you’re sober.”
“You don’t want to know Foster without weed.” “Bite my ass,” Foster barks back.
“Sorry, they’re not housebroken.”
They’re only a step or two on the evolutionary scale from feral chickens, but they’re certainly not boring.
“No, you don’t get it, Taylor.” Frustration crosses his expression. “Your body isn’t something you have to make excuses for. I know I’ve said this before, and I guess I’ll keep saying it until you believe me, but you’re smoking hot. I’d do you right now, in a heartbeat, six different ways if you’d let me.”
“I’m going to fuck your brains out and prove my dick is totally into you.”
“I take it all back. You’re dick kryptonite.”
“First girl to ever reject my cock.” “Not for the first time, either,” I remind him. “Yes, thank you, Taylor. You find me unfuckable. I get it.” Conor flicks up an eyebrow. “It’d be a shame, though.”
“Let’s ride it out.” “Ride it out.” I play with the idea in my head, turning it over. It is, of course, a terribly dishonest and immature suggestion. So, naturally, I’m intrigued. “To what end?” “Marriage, death, or graduation,” he says. “Whichever comes first.”
Or maybe he knows all too well he has that effect on every girl and I am but a toy doll off the assembly line. Lot 251 per one billion. Wind me up and watch me go.
“Abstain? Hell no. I’m gonna try to seduce you at every turn.”
Kill you?! But then how will we ever fuck?
“At least I don’t need you to make out with my girlfriend to get me to fuck her.”
Taylor Marsh has no idea how cool she is, and that’s a fucking shame.
“I’d let Conor Edwards come on my stuffed turtle if he wanted to,” Rachel blurts out. “We know, Rach.” Olivia mimes throwing up in her mouth. “Fucking psycho.”
“Society tells boys to divide and conquer, and tells girls to save ourselves for some younger future version of our father. Just doing some quick math in my head and…yep, that comes out to a bunch of hypocritical bullshit. Your self-worth is not tied up in your vagina or how many girls came before you.”
eye. A girl about to set out on an adventure. It’s sort of cute, in a weird way. My babe’s first dick.
“Go. Run free, you sexy Viking conqueror.”
“You do look like a sexy Viking conqueror.” Then she grabs my hand and grips it tightly. “And you’re not going anywhere, Thor. You’re my wing-man, remember?”
“Hey, Mom. This is Conor. Conor, this is my mom. Doctor Iris Marsh.” “Nice to meet you, Doctor Mom—I mean Doctor Marsh. Fuck.”
“Only thing going down your throat tonight is water or juice or my fist,” he warns.
“Edwards. I don’t know why I’ve been cursed with sitting through this dinner with one of you knuckleheads—I assume I ran over a unicorn or set fire to an orphanage in a past life—but if you act like an idiot tonight I’m going to have you doing bag skates every day until graduation.”
“And miss the chance to judge everyone condescendingly from the corner? Do you not even know me?”
“Oh come on.” Sasha takes another swig of champagne and wipes her mouth with her arm, painting it with lipstick. “We got all dressed up and shaved our legs. The least we can do is have something to regret in the morning.”
“Oh my God, Abigail, fuck off.” My last thread snaps. The bathroom goes deathly silent and I become aware everyone is staring at us. “We get it, okay? You’re a miserable cunt who mistakes bitchiness for a personality. Get a fucking life and get off my dick.”
feel like after two months of dating I should know this. The hell have I been doing this whole time? Eating her pussy, mostly.
“No,” he mocks, “I just like to come in a few times a week to gather petals for my bubble bath.”
“Actually, in my bag there’s a pair of bloody stilettos. If you could dump those over a bridge the next time you head into the city, that’d be super.”
