Out on a Limb

by Hannah Bonam-Young

“Joanna would have loved you, you know. You have her same…care. I can tell life has not been easy or always kind to you, but you haven’t let it turn you hard. Not like a stone. You became like water. You move with it all. You’re soft…but powerful.”

She left a note, saying that she was sorry. That she loved us. That she couldn’t explain why she couldn’t stay, and…she took her own life. Robbie was only twelve weeks old.”

My jaw shakes, then loosens as my tears threaten to pour, thinking of that little boy who’s grown into the man I know. The realization as to why every step of this pregnancy has held such weight to Bo. My feelings, my housing, my finances, my health. All because of what happened to his mother. Because of that guilt he feels.

“I love you, Win. I love you so much it makes me feel like I’ve hated everything else in my life up until now. Nothing compares to what I feel for you. Not even close.”

“It’s your turn now, Win.” “My turn?” I ask, my voice distant. “Everything you poured into your relationship with that…” Bo’s eyes flare, and he takes a breath, steadying himself. “I don’t know everything yet—and I’d really like to talk about it more when you’re ready—but when you said you supported that asshole through school just to get nothing in return, it destroyed me. So yeah, it’s your turn now, Win. To get back that time. To get to where you want to be. Where you deserve to be. And not just because you deserve it. But also because kids like Henry do. Kids like us who need this camp. So, please, let me be a part of it.”