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His entire unbelievably handsome face and his thick, overlong hair seemed to exist in order to be a frame for those magnificent eyes. It did a good job. Excellent.
My girl is obsessed lol
She said 🤌🏼👌🏼
But she was one of those skanky skanks who looked cool. Who worked her skankedness. Who made skankdom something you’d consider aspiring to.
Time passed by and finally it came to me. I knew what it was. I knew it was like when you crushed on an actor or some athlete and you found out he was single and you let yourself have crazy dreams that one day he’d run into you and fall head over heels. Then you’d find out he got married, or got someone pregnant and then (maybe) got married, and your fantasy would die. And it hurt when fantasies died. A lot. But that was exactly what it was.
Lol, seeing the man of her dreams make out with another girl is the death of her dream lol I’m crying… We live for the drama
He would never be mine. I knew this because he was into women who could make skanky cool. Big-haired, blonde, skinny-minnie, big-chested, petite women who could make skanky cool. I had nice hair. It shone with health, it was thick and it was one shade up from blonde, but it wasn’t big. And I had an ample chest, but not that ample. I was not skinny-minnie. I was absolutely not skanky and could never be, no matter if it was cool and could get you Raiden Miller. I just knew I was the kind of girl who had no latent skank huddling deep inside, waiting for the makeup, hairspray and tight clothes
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“thank the good Lord above He gave you those legs. Women the world over would die for your legs. They go on forever, precious girl, and trust your old biddy of a grandmother, she knows, one day, you’ll be glad for those legs.” That day, as much as I loved Grams and knew she was (almost) always right, was not today.
Then I did what I never did. I made a decision and acted on it. I went to my kitchen, got a pad of paper and made a to-do list. Once done, I immediately started on my list. First up, I called Betsy at the salon and told her I needed a new style and she was in charge.
“You named a fat cat Spot,” Raiden stated. “Yes,” I whispered. His amazing eyes dropped to my mouth. I forgot my name. “He wasn’t a fat cat then,” I stupidly went on. “Seeing as, back then, he was just a little kitty.” His eyes came back to mine. “You name a dog Spot,” he informed me. “Okay,” I agreed (again, stupidly). “Unless you’re cute. Then you name a cat Spot.”
She waved a hand at me. “Don’t take away my fun.” She smiled and leaned my way. “Every Friday, him in my yard, sweatin’ and mowin’ my lawn. Even old women need a thrill.” She settled back and closed her eyes. “That right there’s gonna be mine.”
Again, her head turned my way. “Well, you gonna get those afghans or what?” I wanted to say, “Or what.”
“Honey, you look straight out of a chick flick,” he remarked. Again, I blinked. Then, again, I asked, “Sorry?” “Cute outfit. Glass of wine. Sexy, messy hair. Cute house that looks out of a magazine. Not a lick of makeup and you look prettier than any woman I’ve seen for over a year. Gabbin’ on the phone like you look this good, in a place that looks this good every day when that shit’s impossible.” He paused before he concluded, “Chick flick.” Did he say sexy, messy hair? And that I looked prettier than any woman he’d seen for over a year? “Sorry?” I repeated yet again. “Say that again, I’ll
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“Can I ask at this juncture what you’re doing here?” His lips twitched and he answered, “Yeah, baby, at this juncture, you can ask that.” He said no more. But he called me baby.
“I’ll be here tomorrow, six thirty. Not fuckin’ around with all the cute that’s you, we’re goin’ to a steak place, so you’ll wanna dress nice.” All the cute that was me? “I would request that white blouse you crawled around the pet store in,” he went on, and I felt my face start to heat at the reminder of my idiocy, which, clearly, Raiden didn’t recall as idiotic. “But everything I’ve seen you in since then is far from disappointing,” his eyes swept my chest and legs before coming back to my face, “so I’m lookin’ forward to the surprise.”
“Do we have time for you to come in for a drink?” “You don’t want me comin’ in for a drink,” was his reply, and I felt my brows draw together. “I don’t?” “You, that dress, those shoes, that hair, beverages and furniture you can get horizontal on would not be a good combination.” “Oh,” I whispered, and with his words it hit me like a shot that he was into me.
I also wondered what I should order since there was no way I was ordering à la carte, building on the foundation of a fifty dollar steak if I didn’t know how deep that would cut into his wallet. “Mood in the Jeep suddenly veered south,” he remarked. I looked at him. “Sorry?” “You don’t seem fired up about Chilton’s,” he noted. “Um, I am, of course. I’ve been there once before. It’s really nice but it’s…” What did I say? “Not exactly cheap.” “You bought me a sexy dress, least I can do.”
you’ve not once said my name.” “You’re Raiden Miller, Rachelle’s big brother,” I told him and, for some bizarre reason, that made him burst out laughing. It was gorgeous, lush. It warmed me through and through, and I smiled while he did it, but I didn’t understand it. When it started waning, I said, “I don’t get it. Why are you laughing?” He trained his amazing eyes on me. “Rache would love that. She’s always been Raiden’s little sister.”
“You told me you had a goddamned headache, which worried me, then you pressed tight to me, giving me your mouth and takin’ it away, a bullshit bitch tease move I didn’t know you had it in you to execute.” She stopped dead. “I wasn’t teasing you.” “What was that shit then?” She stared into his eyes and announced, “A good-bye kiss.”
She’d quit breathing, which was good. That meant she couldn’t spout more bullshit.
“Warm afghans, pretty blue eyes, totally dorky and an unbelievably wet, sweet pussy,” he murmured against my neck, then lifted his head and looked down at me before he finished on a whisper, “The girl of my dreams.”
“Baby, last night, those kisses, I hoped to Christ that was a preview of things to come and I’m fuckin’ thrilled it was. Out there, you can ride that silly-ass bike, but now I know, in my bed, you’re gonna let go for me. You’re gonna let me play with that body. You’re gonna let me work you ’til you’re so fuckin’ wet you’re drenched for me. And when I let you come I’m gonna make it feel like you’re coming apart at the seams. And only I’m gonna know you give me that. Only I’m gonna get that. And I’m fuckin’ overjoyed that’s all for me and only me.” Wow. That was hot, cool, sexy, sweet and
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“Need you to get me a cane, child. Not to walk with it, so I can beat Margaret over the head with it.” Raiden chuckled. Margaret gasped. So did I, before I hissed, “Grams, we’re in church!” She waved her hand in front of her face, “God’s forgiven me for a lot over ninety-eight years, that’s the least of it.”
She snapped her mouth shut to hiss at Raiden like he was twelve, not thirty-two, “Well, I don’t believe it. I’ll be having a word with your mother, Raiden Miller.” “Have at it. She won’t give a flying mostly because she thinks you’re as foul-tempered and aggravating as everyone else in town,” Raiden fired back. A couple people heard and tittered, proving him right.
If you’re the kind of woman who can withstand the blaze of hellfire he’s got burning inside, he battles that and wins, you will know nothing for the rest of your life, no taste, no experience, not even the birth of your children that will be sweeter than the love he’ll have for you.”
Grams was right. She always was. Raiden was dangerous. And I knew I shouldn’t. She warned me to be careful. But for some reason I didn’t understand I couldn’t stop myself from being that woman who tried to withstand hellfire. No. I knew the reason. It was because I wanted to know nothing for the rest of my life sweeter than the love Raiden could have for me. It was also more. I wanted him to know nothing for the rest of his sweeter than what I could give him.
“I like to play.” I shut my mouth. “You got a hint of that last night,” he went on. A hint? Oh God. “Yeah?” he prompted. Oh yeah, I got it, but I didn’t know it was a hint. Still, I nodded. “And you got off on it,” he noted. I so did. I nodded again. “I wanna give you more.” Oh my God.
“But anything I do, anything I ask you to do, it doesn’t work for you, it doesn’t turn you on, no matter how deep we are in it, Hanna, you say the word ‘solitaire’ and we switch it up, find somethin’ we both enjoy that gets us both off.” I knew what he was saying. I’d heard about it. He was talking about a safe word.
🤭
I heard and felt his rumbled, “You good?” “Um…they haven’t measured this level of good, thus it has as yet gone undefined, so the answer is yes, but the word is wrong.”
“Don’t move.” I settled because there was a command to his voice, but it was different. It was like the way he said “hey” except more. A lot more. I stayed where I was, eyes glued to him, feeling funny in a way so good, it was absofuckingmazing good.
“You, just like that, any man would fight and die for the privilege of comin’ home to that every day.”
“Better, she accepts you just as you are, then makes a special coffeecake with apples and doesn’t skimp on the streusel, which is the best part. All that to celebrate you givin’ her your trust and her givin’ hers right back to you.”
Her voice got sharp when she warned, “Do not take this lightly, child. You knew the danger, you still made a decision, took on this job and now you got people countin’ on you. His momma, his sister, me, the town and, most importantly, him.”
“Proud of you,” she said and she sounded it. My heart warmed, but the smile I gave her was shaky. “Thanks, Grams.” “I’m proud, but that don’t mean I’m not worried. Fire’s gonna get hot, chère. You made your choice. You do what you gotta do to take the heat.” I nodded. “Hope I live to see it,” she continued and my heart lurched.
“I know, child. What do you think’s keepin’ me on this earth? Not easy to let go that kind of love. That kind of love’s got the power to hold you tethered to a world you should have left a long time ago.”
When I heard the Jeep return, my nerves, already frayed, unraveled completely. I was so rattled it was a wonder I wasn’t a trembling mess, incapable of movement. But this was important. People were counting on me, and two of those people included Raiden and me.
“You might think that’s jacked, but it’s not. It’s the goddamned fuckin’ truth. Whether you got that in your bed before you go or hope to find it when you get back, that’s why you do it. You do it for her. You do it to keep her safe. You planted kids inside her, or you hope to, you do it for them. You get home in one piece, she’s your reward.” His body pressed into mine and his face, partly shadowed, came to within an inch of mine. “You’re my reward, Hanna.” My reward. Oh. My. God. Raiden wasn’t done. “I didn’t know it. When I was over there doin’ what I had to do, I didn’t have any fuckin’
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😭😭😭😭😩😩😩😩🩷🤭😭😭😭😭😩😣😮💨
And if they can sacrifice everything so you can have your porch swing and I can come home and have everything they lost, you can fuckin’ learn how to take the heat and give it to me.” “Okay,” I agreed immediately. I agreed so immediately, Raiden’s, “Come again?” was clipped and short with surprise. “Okay, honey. I’ll learn how to take the heat.”
“Right,” he stated. “Then I need you to promise me something.” “Okay,” I replied. He pulled away, cupped my jaw in both hands and tipped my head back so he could catch my eyes in the dim light. “I give you shit, you do not eat it. Like today, you give it back to me. We’ll work it out, Hanna, but we’ll do it like we did it tonight. Not you getting where my head is at and bowin’ to that in hopes you takin’ my shit eventually turns something in me. Today, I stepped far over the line and that is not cool. After I calmed my ass down, I spent the last two hours standing on your porch, thinkin’ if I
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“Baby, bein’ seriously serious, you are the only thing in four years that has come close to getting me to a place where I can even begin to think I might be able to bear those flames.”
“Now, are you gonna fuck me or spend the next hour talkin’ to me?” he asked. “I suppose I’ll fuck you,” I muttered. His voice held humor when he returned, “Obliged you’d make that sacrifice for me.” I glanced at the swing then at him. “Uh…how do I fuck you?” “Babe, you’ve ridden my lap before.” This was true. I looked to the porch ceiling at the hooks holding up the swing then down to Raiden. “Do you think the swing can withstand this activity?” “I don’t know. What I do know is I wanna find out.”
“One more thing before we tear each other up,” he said. “What?” I asked. Then, even with all that had happened that day, and especially all that had gone on the last twenty minutes, as usual, Raiden Miller still managed to rock my world. He did this by saying straight out, with feeling, “Thank you, baby, for forgiving me.”
I put him in the basket. He sat on his ample behind, said, “Meow” and faced forward, telling me he was ready to roll.
wagged my finger an inch from Spot’s kitty nose. “Be good.” He made a kitty face at me, which said clearly he would be whatever the heck he wanted to be.
I ignored my heart hammering and asked, “Breaking all that down, are you saying you want to move in with me?” “Uh…yeah, Hanna. I decided to have a home again, and after I spend time dealin’ with scum, I wanna come home. Home to a house with a porch swing where I can wash that scum down the drain and climb into bed with a woman who puts an outrageously fat cat in her ludicrous basket on her ridiculous bike. My woman.” “My bike isn’t ridiculous,” I protested. “Babe,” he leaned in, “it is.” I ignored that too, and semi-repeated, “You want to move in?” His brows snapped together. “Are you
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“I take it I just got myself a porch swing,” he remarked. “You so totally got yourself a porch swing,” I replied.
“Am I gonna traumatize the fat cat if he sees me fuckin’ you?” “As you know, his name is Spot, and he’s immune to trauma. You can’t feel it if your life is devoted to dishing it out.”
“She doesn’t do it for me, Hanna, because I didn’t fall in love with her when I saw her across a street, hair shining in the sun, laughing. You do it for me because you were that girl across the street, your hair shining in the sun, laughing, making me fall in love with you, and I didn’t even goddamned fucking know you.”
“So thank fuck, my mouth on yours, you explode and let go and latch on to my dick while I’m drivin’ your car and dig your nails in my back when you come for me, ’cause, baby, that means you give it all to me. Not one woman in my life gave it all to me and not one man can expect that. Hope for it. Yeah. Get it. No. You give it all, so that means I’ve got it all.”
’Cause all you gotta know is it’s gonna be you—and only you—until the day I die, because life did not lead me down the wrong path when I fell in love with a girl who had the sun shining in her hair who would eventually not do it for me. You’re not just enough for me. You’re everything I want. So that works for me.”
Then, not finished blurting, I shared, “I beat you. I fell in love with you when I was six and I didn’t know who you were.” I saw the tension flow out of his body. His neck twisted, head dropping forward, eyes closing, and he stood in silent contemplation for a moment before he lifted his head, looked at me and said quietly, “Okay, baby, you win.” “Absolutely,” I replied.
sleep in the other room ’til I’m good, know I got them under control, then I’ll come back,” he replied. My back shot straight and my lips, rough and commanding, stated, “No. You. Will. Not.” I felt his body jolt around me. “Hanna—” “They do not get to take you away from me,” I snapped, and at that I felt his frame string tight. I didn’t care. I moved my hands to either side of his head and brought my face close. “They tore huge chunks of you away and they can have those. I can’t get those back, but they are not taking the you that’s mine away from me.” “Babe—” “No,” I bit off. “I waited for
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“You got that, honey. But you got it understanding right now we make a deal that if that happens again, no matter how it happens, I hurt you, I almost hurt you, we’re done and I move to the other room until I get a lock on it.” “Raid—” “No, babe, that’s your compromise and as far as I’m willin’ to go. I love you’d take the risk. I love you don’t want to lose me. But see it from my perspective. If I actually hurt you, I’d have to live with that. Don’t make me.” I got that, and while I didn’t like it, I got it, so I’d give it to him. “Okay. I won’t make you.” “Thank you.”
War hero, this is a great compromise and I’m proud.
