Something Lost, Something Gained: Reflections on Life, Love, and Liberty

by Hillary Rodham Clinton

I also marveled at the empathy Shannon managed to summon for even the most (yes, let’s say it) deplorable bigots. She has known the worst of the worst and still finds room in her heart for them as human beings, still believes it’s worth the effort, the emotional labor, to reach out to them.

“Hopeless people,” she told me, are “easily controlled and manipulated. But hopeful people can move mountains.” It isn’t easy to keep hold of that hope, but Shannon doesn’t think there’s any other choice. Our country has “mountains that need moving,” she said, so “I feel an obligation to hope.”

“Most people really don’t become friends. They become deep and serious acquaintances.” Sister friends are different. They know your spirit. Your values coincide. They see the real you and love you anyway.

I cannot fit in these pages all the stories of all the women dear to me. But I hope to capture, in these few snapshots, the special magic of girlfriends that’s possible at any age—and no matter who you are—if your heart is open and generous and willing to do the work of meaningful friendship.

Here is what I know from a long career in politics and diplomacy: The best-laid plans fall apart. It takes a lot of careful planning, courage, and creativity to make things happen.

“I am prepared to speak with those I dislike and distrust, or whose ideas differ from mine, if it means that I carry on with my work. Better that than to shout from afar.”

I was also there because I believe that to understand a complex policy problem you need to understand the people most affected. You need to listen to their stories, see their struggles, and hear their hopes.

Globally, women and girls represent 80 percent of climate refugees—and that number is sure to grow in the years ahead. When women are displaced, they are at increased risk of violence, human trafficking, and stalled education and employment opportunities.

We don’t have to agree on every policy point to respect the anguish they feel.

The more we live in social media echo chambers, the less we trust one another and the more we struggle to find common ground with or feel empathy for people who have different perspectives and experiences.

And here’s proof that no matter how old you get or how far you climb, you never outgrow your mother:

it will take 286 years to close global gender gaps in legal protection and remove discriminatory laws against women, 140 years for equal representation in positions of power, and at least 40 years to achieve gender parity in national parliaments.