Nathan was everything I should have wanted. Everything I should need, but I sat there knowing that what I wanted and needed was something else entirely. Someone else entirely. That’s the only way I was going to feel whole. That was the only way I was going to heal. By having him. By realising what it was to be wanted by him. To be loved by him. And since I knew it was impossible, because he wasn’t capable of it, that knowledge was a new but familiar kind of devastation.
