Between Now and Forever

by Adriana Locke

“You’ll be happy to know that my to-do list includes three things: keeping my children alive, keeping them out of the juvenile hall, and having more fun. In that order.”

Would it be that terrible to give in and just enjoy being a woman looking at a fine male specimen for a minute?

“We like five foot one, maybe five two, dark-blond or light-brown-haired women who are wrapped in a towel in the middle of the yard and look at us like we’re the man of their dreams.”

“Good boy. Go back to your truck. I’ll be fine.”

“We’ll still do life together. We’ll just do it from different houses.” Christopher smiles at me with the same goofy grin Dylan used to wear. “You deserve a lover, someone to appreciate all the wild goodness you have to offer. This doesn’t mean I don’t love you, Gabs. It just means that there’s someone else out there who can love you better. And I love you enough to want that for you.”

“I love you, buddy. I’m here. I’ll always be here—on your team,” I say gently. “But please remember that I’m a person and I have feelings too. And the way you’ve been talking to me hurts. I don’t want to punish you and make your life harder, but I can’t let you think that your behavior is okay.”

“Your face doesn’t look happy, and you don’t want to talk about stuff. You’re sad.”

“You give . . . lonely vibes.”

Who does that kid think he is? Lonely vibes? Lonely vibes, my ass. And what kind of elementary school kid says things like that?

One interaction with Carter and I’m afraid I’m going to crack. One interaction with Dylan and I want to whip him into shape. Every interaction with Gabrielle makes me want to have another.

He’s my kind, albeit gorgeous, neighbor. That’s all.

“Look, kissing you would’ve been giving in to the moment. Did I want to kiss you? Of course. You’re gorgeous.”

You’re the first woman that’s made my heart race in a long time. That’s why you’re so dangerous.

“She is. And every day we spend together, I hope there’s another one to follow. She says she wants to live again.” His smile fades into the shy grin that melts my heart. “But I didn’t even realize I wasn’t living until I met her.”

But Jay? He could build the damn chair. And he’d do it with the very best wood and without missing a screw—no pun intended.

“Let me break this down into the simplest form. The way I see it, and I’m basically an expert in this arena—Peter needs to have sex to have a connection. You, on the other hand, need to have a connection to have sex.”

“None of that matters because you’re right,” I say, my hand on the doorknob. “We need to stop this. Because I won’t fight for a man that won’t bother to fight for me.”

I need her. My girl. The love of my fucking life.

No matter what it takes, I’m going to fix this. I’m going to convince Gabrielle to take me back. It might have taken me a long time to get here, but I’m not going back. They are mine—all three of them. And I won’t let them go again.

“I came here to tell you that I will never walk away from you again and I’m a fucking fool for doing it the first time. I’m fighting for us and I won’t stop.”

“My respect for you runs deep,”

“If you don’t trust me, if you want to protect your boys, that’s fine. I understand. But I will work every fucking day to show you that I’m committed. I’m here. I will fight for us, even if you think it’s over.”

“Because it’s not over for me. It can never be over. Because I love ...

“You’re in control. You call the shots. I’ll play by your rules as long as you let me play.”

“Will you let me love you?” he asks. “Can I have another chance?”

“what kind of a chance do you want?”

“All of it. The whole chance. As much of a chance as you’ll give me.”

“I love you. I thought I might, and that’s partially why I bailed. But I realized last night I love you so much that I can’t walk away. All I could do was hide from it—or try to, anyway.”

“How long do marriages last?” I look up at Jay and laugh. “A long time,” Dylan says. “Leave them alone. Let them have a moment, Carter.” “But how long is a long time?” Carter asks. “We will be married our whole lives,” Jay says, squeezing my hand. “Between now and forever.”