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Pops would wink and play grab ass when she walked by, and it would make her light up like a kid in a candy store.
I offer a new trinket for her to add to her collection of gizmos and gadgets, and she melts.
“You’re a man, honey. I’m afraid there’s nothing special about any of you.”
That’s the thing about grief, I guess. It steals the air from your lungs just as you’ve finally figured out how to breathe.
“Don’t call me a bitch, bitch.” I set my coffee cup down.
“Watch your mouth,” he says slowly, his New York accent coming through strong, dropping the r and elongating the vowels. “You won’t disrespect yourself to me.”
“It was my favorite day of the year, though.” “Because it was your birthday?” “Because for that one day, my momma loved me out loud.”
“I don’t do anything I don’t want to.”
He grins and straightens. “It’s a deal.” “That’s it?” I cross my arms. “You folded just like that?” He shrugs. “Sure, if it will make you happy.” A smile breaks across my face unbidden. If it will make you happy.
“You really don’t need to do that. I’m fine.” “I didn’t ask if you were fine. In fact…” I move closer to her. “I don’t remember asking for your opinion at all.”
She’s got about five more minutes before I tear the place down to find her.
Truthfully, I could stare at her all night in all her forms and never get sick of it.
Weak men always let their dicks do the thinking, and strong women know how to take advantage of that.
That’s what she is to me: a work of art.
“I watched you torture a man and then cleaned you of his blood. I think that provides a certain level of intimacy, of trust, don’t you?” he says.
“I already told you,” he utters. “I see you. Even when you look away.”
“If I shouldn’t kill you…” He looks at me from the corner of his eye before staring back out at the water. “Then what should I do with you?” A warning siren blares in my head, screaming, Danger! Danger! Do not answer! I ignore it. “Whatever you want,” I reply. His gaze snaps to mine, and that light feeling in the air pulls taut, wrapping around my chest and squeezing. Heat blasts up my neck and into the apples of my cheeks, and I place the back of my hand against them, attempting to cool off. “Whatever I want,” he repeats slowly, his eyes tracing along every single contour of my body,
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She makes me forget who I am, who I’m supposed to be, and makes me feel like all I want to be is hers.
I’m fucking gone while I watch her. The world could light itself on fire behind us, and I don’t think I’d care.
There’s a single moment where I consider how ridiculous this is, how juvenile, but it’s gone in the next second, because if she’s giving me a chance to grab her, to hold her in my arms for even a moment, I’m not going to let that opportunity pass me by. So I do. Chase her, I mean.
I don’t really know what to say or if she even wants me to say anything, so I just sit still and listen. This is what I wanted anyway. To know her. And it feels like she’s giving me a piece of her soul as she talks. It’s selfish because I’m not giving much back, but like the greedy man I am, I take it anyway.
“Your view on the world changes when you have to parent your parents.”
I may not have ever been her first choice, but she was always mine.”
“It’s amazing how fast you learn to shutter emotions when you’re protecting someone you love.”
Everyone has a weakness. Some of us are just better at covering ours up with false bravado.
Admitting our own flaws is hard, but embracing them is even harder, so the fact he’s willing to get on the Ferris wheel despite how afraid he is tells me a lot about him.
“Say something.” He demands it this time. “Why?” I force out, my body so hot that I feel like I’m burning from the inside out. “Because if you don’t, I’ll kiss the fuck out of you.”
Because no matter how badly I might want him… Enzo isn’t mine to have. And I’m not worth the fallout there would be if we gave in.
You can’t erase memories from a brain by whispering sweet words, and even the heaviest of makeup washes away eventually, leaving nothing behind but the ugly truth.
“In a different life”—I bend until my mouth is centimeters from hers—“I would do anything to make you mine, and I’d bring you any person who’s wronged you and make them beg for death at your feet. All you’d have to do is say the word.”
“Who the fuck are you?” “I’m the guy who’s about to kill you if you touch her again.” Enzo’s voice is low and lethal, and it’s inappropriate timing, but heat flares between my legs. “In fact, don’t even look at her.”
“I can take care of myself,” I say, the same way I always do. He reaches out to grip my chin, tilting my face up to meet his. “I know. But just because you can doesn’t mean you should have to.”
If there’s one thing a man will do, it’s disappoint you.
And for as strong of a woman as she is, for everything she is that no one else sees,she’s asking for me to take control. To relieve her from being someone who always has to take care of everything on her own, because if she doesn’t, then no one will.
“That’s my girl.”
“In a different life,” I start, my voice shaky from the restraint of holding myself back, “I would be on my knees, feasting on you every day for the rest of our lives.”
“In a different life, it would be you on my arm, and you I’d get to marry. And I’d take you home and fuck you in our bed, sinking my cock so deep inside you that you’d never get me out.”
Most of which he wasn’t ever home to actually be in, but I guess that’s why we record things: so we can experience memories we were never truly part of.
“Control is quiet. It’s masterful. It doesn’t need to make a show or take up space because it is the space, and it allows everyone to exist within it. If you think Trent fucking Kingston can take control from you, then you never had it to begin with.”
I’ve never been the jealous type, but I can’t stand watching other people touch her.
“Baby, you walk into a room and every head turns. You think you can be anywhere I am and I won’t notice?”
Fireworks explode in my chest, sparks floating down and settling deep in my abdomen. Everything around me dims, paling compared to this moment. I’m finally kissing the woman I’m in love with. The realization hits me like a ball against a baseball bat. Goddamn. I love her.
“Christ, you’re sexy when you come,” I tell her.
Her tongue tangles with mine, and I’m so fucking turned on, I can’t even breathe properly because the thought of her tasting herself on me is the hottest thing I’ve ever experienced.
“Fuck, that’s it, baby. You’re doing so well. Such a perfect girl for me.”
“She’s the only girl.”
“All I care about is that you’re here now, with me. You’re mine, and I am so fucking yours, Venesa Andersen. Tell me you know that.”
The way Uncle T is acting completely unhinged at the thought of someone touching his precious daughter has me realizing even the greatest of men have their weaknesses. And it’s usually a woman behind their downfall.
“I’m doing this for us,” he tells me. “So we can finish this and I can love you out loud. In this life.”
“The truth is, Yrsa Venesa Andersen, my soul knew you were its other half the moment I laid eyes on you. You have changed me. Irrevocably. I don’t want you in a different life. I need you in this one and all the ones we’ll have after.”
