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July 13 - July 18, 2025
We thrive when we have a positive goal to move toward, not just a negative state we’re trying to move away from.
Imagine a rabbit being chased by a fox, and she runs under a bush to hide. How long does she stay there? Until the fox is gone, right? When your brain is stuck in the middle of the cycle, it may lose the ability to recognize that the fox has gone, so you just stay under that bush—that is, you come home from work and watch cat videos while eating ice cream directly from the container, using potato chips for a spoon, or stay in bed all weekend, hiding from your life. If you’re hiding from your life, you’re past your threshold. You aren’t dealing with either the stress or the stressor. Deal with
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“self-regulatory fatigue”; if you’re using up decision-making and attention-focusing cognitive resources on choices about food, clothes, exercise, makeup, body hair, “toxins,” and fretting about your body’s failures, what are you too exhausted to care about, that you would otherwise prioritize?
So yes indeed, it would be nice to be thin, because it would privilege us with the gift of being treated like actual people, no matter what.
All she had to do to accept their help was let go of her impulse to be in control and make everything perfect. Ha. “All.”
Our culture treats you as if “being productive” is the most important measure of your worth, as if you are a consumable good.
It’s not a self-help book for women without the injunction to “practice gratitude,” right?