Attunement and creating space for a safe interaction slows our brains, orients us in our story, and gives us perspective on our problems. It gives us more access to the roots of what is triggering us and more ground to grow good fruit. So the next time your pulse quickens in a moment of tension, pause. When your brain jumps to a familiar survival reaction with your spouse, stop. Give yourself a minute. Notice your instinctive responses and what you’re reacting to. Remind yourself there could be another way. Slowly consider the roots and the bigger story, for both you and your spouse. And then
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